I stare at the wall
never wanting
never knowing
never needing
anything at all
but I was confused
dazed and unaware
that there was more
than screams of pain
as if held by chains
I put out the call
my grieving was
the song of sorrow
that
defined
me
as I slept
as I walked
as I stared
at the wall
I dreamt of angels
but it was
demons chasing
me all the way
to hell
but they didn't
want a fool
like me
they didn't long
for an idiot
so
unredeemed
and naively
so
a child
to the sorrow
he held closely
my heart was broken
over and over
I refused attempts
by them
the people who loved
to repair
the beating thing
I walked
I stared
and slept
And never
woke from this
gray
that surrounds me
I am buried
in the ground
but am not dead
yet
but I am ready
ever ready so
