Welcome


I am a poet who has both been published and self published. All work on this blog is all copyright Alex Ness. While I make very little money from my work I am technically a professional. Measuring by the hours I've written I am professional. My goal is to share my work with as many people that can read it, as far as the internet may reach with it. I hope if you are moved you will share this blog with others, and perhaps buy my books.

Whatever the result, thank you for viewing this blog. I cannot express how greatly I appreciate the many people, from many places upon the earth, who have visited.

I bid you peace.

Je ne regrette pas la douleur, car il m'a fait plus forte

copyright notice

copyright notice

Tuesday, January 24, 2017

Vanity pulls

Despite the agony
My path is straight
My voice is clear
When I stare deeply
Into the black hole
I become drawn in
By my vanity
Telling me that
I matter
But it is a lie
I am drawn by gravity
Confusing me
Breaking too many times
I've lived too few lives
Too little love
Too little hope
My whole life
Has been toxic
Abject depravity
I am not alive
Unliving isn't living
Blood pumps in my body
Colored red
But I am dead
I am a spirit inhabiting
An emptiness
A cavity
Of flesh
And darkness


Saturday, January 21, 2017

Fires of Heaven

Rain of fire
Pour down upon me
Clean my body
Of misery
When the days come
The red sky falls
I will be ready
I will be done
Burn me to ash
Let me cleaned
Of my desires
Let me be purified
Lift me upon the pyre
And light the match
Let me be
The sacrifice
The lamb
For the slaughter
Although I am not pure
Although I am flawed
My soul has fled
My body is ready
Azrael has given me
His kiss
I am willing
I am able
I will not resist
Take me now


Friday, January 20, 2017

Thirst

My love for you is a tapestry
Woven with golden silk
Hours spent creating
Caused me agony
But it was worth it
With every second of pain
I am fulfilled
Rich in detail and thread
I have been working
Assembling the portrait
Upon the canvas
And in my heart
In crimson red
I love you without shame
I am awake in your great love
You are my hope
And you inspire my hand
With every stitch
Every thread and needle
Crossed my heart
So very rich
In detail
I may in this life never
Solve the riddle
Of who you are
But a tree doesn't need to know
Water's composition
To know it thirsts
And I thirst for you
You are my vision
And your love
Breaks every single curse



Thursday, January 19, 2017

Unspoken

you said you don't care
so why do you bother
why do you wonder
upon my worry
why do you ask
why I break
I knew you'd discover
my version of chaos theory
was compiled of chance
and hate
Overwhelming me
Blocking out each window
To the world and beyond
Darkness
Calls
Like
Unto
Like
This broken heart spawned
By the lack of knowing
After so long
Called from the dark
I am alive
But broken
Filled with words
But unspoken



Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Lost

I fell down seven flights
Of stairs
I never knew where I was
I just kept on
Walking after I rose up
Because when you are lost
What does it matter the way
You go
In this masquerade
I walked without aid
No costume I wore
But that of a whore
I swam in her crimson skies
I broke her grotesque lies
And I never ever decided
If she was the one
To take me away
From the world of the flesh
Because I am a liar
And never know
Whether my heart or my mind
is the one going astray
I never know
if I am filled with rage
Or if I am just listening
to the idiots who say
I should be angry
about everything
That gets in their way




Tuesday, January 17, 2017

From Babylon to Oblivion

across your face
a wry smile landed
you laughed and said
my past is dead
let it burn
you left that place
never wanting to return
you burnt your bridges
to show the world
you meant
every word
and now you walk
alone and long
from dawn to dusk
the road goes far
all the way
to Babylon
Or Oblivion
just somewhere
far away
where no one
remembers
your name



Monday, January 16, 2017

unlove

as a child he never held my hand
he never wanted me
he had his own
never let it be said that I didn't notice
he wanted the one, not plural, not children
the shame he had for his having me
in his home
I couldn't change as a foetus
because he didn't foresee
who I would become
he just chose
to ignore
unlove
unwant
me

Sunday, January 15, 2017

Everyone pays

I've been cast through time
And I've lost days
Seconds and hours mean nothing
I've been in a daze
Tomorrow holds no promise
Yesterday is gone
I stand in the darkness
Of a timeless shame
I am all alone
The world spins
But I stood still
And I have never
Moved from this place
I am alone in my misery
Alone I have no history
And I cannot escape
The ravages of time



Saturday, January 14, 2017

Madness

I am truly breaking
And I've spent too long
Waiting
For help that will never arrive
Insanity has taken me
My hope is shattered
Everything is gone wrong
Shaking
I will never survive
This is not a dream
I can never wake up
From not sleeping
I can never dream
When my eyes are open
And I am aware
Of the world around me


Friday, January 13, 2017

Crushed

Crushed by the weight
of my indecision
Bruised by the cost
of every bad choice
The future sees me
forsaken at every corner
Without reason
Without a voice
Without honor
I cannot bear the burden any more
I can't bear the cost of the choices
Any more
Crushed and I am going to break
And I have no way
But dying
To escape


Thursday, January 12, 2017

walk away

my dreams are dying
my screams are lying

so many false things
get into my
heart
so many
true things
reveal
themselves

no sweet serenade
no tender kid parades
balloons and street fairs
happy friendly neighbors
we share
fireworks and ice tea
beer and laughing
but no one is there

everyone is gone
far from home
it isn't fair
my heart can't take
any more
all alone

goodbye again
again
I miss you
but you are
so far away
gone again

my dreams dying
screaming
and lying
everything
no longer matters


Suck

My memories of being
With you are such misery
My pain makes me ask
If I should get gasoline
And make them burn
Just burn
Until they are ash
But I can't
When we were together
I reached into my soul
Transcended my boundaries
Only to come
Crashing down
Out of control
More fun was had at funerals
And cemeteries and ossuaries
But for the time
You made me think
I could be happy
Even if it was momentary
A tale that was cautionary
For the morons to follow
But I only have now
And I only have words
No one listens
And no one cares
My life is hollow
I am popular as germs
Or worms
But I have those memories
I'll hold onto them
For a while now