I am a poet who has both been published and self published. All work on this blog is all copyright Alex Ness. While I make very little money from my work I am technically a professional. Measuring by the hours I've written I am professional. My goal is to share my work with as many people that can read it, as far as the internet may reach with it. I hope if you are moved you will share this blog with others, and perhaps buy my books.

Whatever the result, thank you for viewing this blog. I cannot express how greatly I appreciate the many people, from many places upon the earth, who have visited.

I bid you peace.

Je ne regrette pas la douleur, il a m'a rendu plus fort.

Friday, September 5, 2014

The Moment I Saw You

The moment I saw you
For the first time
I bit my lip to keep from saying
God have mercy upon me
I had been upon my knees
For a vision
And you were that and more
Your beauty was stunning
Beyond the reach
Of my prayer
Your mind a challenge
A mystery of grace
Filled with knowledge
And strength
I knew the moment
I saw you
That I was condemned
To forever want
What I cannot have
An irredeemable desire
A flood that could not be stemmed
That single moment
I stood
Alive for the first time
About to be crushed
By a wave
Of desire
To reach an unreachable height
In unquenchable fire

Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Winds of my soul, blow through

  Cast out and filled with doubt
I have fallen
My flesh now cold
Winter without snow
Winds blow
Burn inside of me
Inside my soul
As I am cast aside
Losing a sacred destiny
Out of my reach
Future consumed
A quest failed
Deeply wounded
Crows call out
Telling me to look
Beyond myself
Through my cloak of sorrow
Wrapped across this body
The pain flows
I was burning inside
My eyes were dry
I had cried
Bitter tears
Every time
They had poured down
Like a flood
Over the barren desert plain
From my deepest pain
Dust came rising up
From my boots
In the Valley of Death
I wore a crown of thorns
Caked in blood
And dirt
My destiny fading
I had no home
I walked
Broken by cynical fears
Broken by jaded dreams
Until you came to my side
I finally woke unto my being
My flesh became alive
When I tasted your soul
I became worthwhile
When I touched
Your hand
I became hope
You amaze me
Your spirit is flying
High above the surface
Beyond anything I know
Exquisite and elegant
Angelic vision
Otherworld exotic
Beauty beyond measure
Nothing so vulgar or erotic
You are a higher being
Above all humanity
Holding me
As you soar
Teaching me the truth
As your celestial spirit beams
Far from the land I know
From Eden to urbanity
From existence
To surreality
Yours is the star
Rising over the horizon
To be celebrated by lower beings
Because you are worthy
Of the love and adoration
I feel your serenity
As the peace surrounds you
A blanket of stars
Wrap us tightly
I am by your side
You are healing me
From a lifetime
That had scarred
My soul
You are my destiny
I know
Now I know

Friday, August 29, 2014

Your Celestial Beauty

Like looking
Into a blazing sun
I saw you once
And I went blind
Your beauty burned
Into my mind
My suffering had begun
No one can replace you
Burning inside, me
No one can be your love
I can not embrace you
I am not the one
So throw me out
Throw me down
Leave me behind
What are you going to do
About that
Right now?

Thursday, August 28, 2014


Some who don't believe
Suggest I should try to die
Because I believe in eternity

Some who do believe
Say there should not be suicide
Because it violates God's creed

I say that my life is my fate
My journey comes from inside
And my path isn't for debate

I do believe
And have tried 
To live in a way to please my God

I hang on here by a thread
Because of those who I love
But I'm ready for the Isle of the Dead

The thread weaves through my life
My son and my wife
And all of my family and friends

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Damn him

As if it needs to be hidden
So surreptitious
They say that he can make you do it
Cupid makes people fall in love
By shooting their hearts with arrows
Love is so capricious?
I say if anyone sees him doing it
Grab him before he flies away
And shove those arrows
Where his butt cheeks narrow

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

I am Broken, Again

Broken again
Your arms reach out
And my fear is tamed
I can't help but hope
When I hear your voice
Calling me
To be embraced
In your arms
Soothed until
My tears fade
There is only you for me
Nothing else helps me through
This existence tears
Me apart at the seams
Your love frees me
Mends my heart
Reminds me of heaven
Let me soar in the sky
Where I touch the stars
With you
Your hand in mine
Soft but holding
Me from falling
Like always
But caught
In your arms

Monday, August 25, 2014


Her beauty moved men
But she was more than beautiful
Bright and thoughtful
Was filled with questions
Lived to know the answers
She was wounded by life
But still tried
When is a life perfect?
When can we know it is good
Cathy sleeps in Elysium
I miss her now and forever
But she can now find all the answers
And is no longer misunderstood
Farewell beautiful spirit
Broken for the pleasure of others
Farewell my friend
You live anew
While my sorrow smothers

Sunday, August 24, 2014

The Far Edge of Existence

I walked all the way
To the far edge of existence
I didn't find you waiting there
Like a kid for Christmas
What there was
What there should have been
Two different things
But I got neither
For my persistence
All I found
Was wanting
And no relent
To the torment
Of being without you 
Not even for a fucking moment
I  miss you
Your scent
Your sound
Your presence
And I am left alone
Forever in your absence
And still searching
Finding no 

Saturday, August 23, 2014

Grieving the Innocence Lost

I believe that
We are courting doom
Not by ignorance
But apathy
And the lack
Of humanity

Someday soon
We will be able to clone
And selectively breed
So humans can live longer

That is
Except for those
Harvested for parts
Killed in utero
For the convenience
Those bred to die
The future world
Will be even more cold
As we become meat
And wars are no longer fought
For virtues and ideals
But for gold
Wrought from greed
And the human transformation
Into machine

Henry Adams 
Photo Credit:
 Foter.com / Public Domain Mark 1.0

Friday, August 22, 2014

Room in your heart

Despite knowing the truth
I sometimes wonder
Why it was like this
Why was there room in
Your heart, your heart
You took me into that heart
I will never forget
Never regret
One single moment
Because of you
If I were passing through
This life alone
It would have killed me
Still might kill me
If I am without you
But your heart had room
So I know where the truth is
It is in your heart
In your love
And I am glad

Thursday, August 21, 2014

Toxic Life

I did endure
Called from the darkness
Survived toxic waste
Avoiding cultural pollution
Having seen life I know
Truth is not the solution
Death is not an answer
My life has been apportioned
And I accept my punishment
Execution by your hand
Have I survived
My adult abortion
No matter how I am judged
My continued existence
Reveals only resistance
To the notion
That others control my life
Your decision
Negates my position
Within the boundaries
Of your womb
It became my tomb
A pool of blood
In which I drown
Flushed down
With all the waste
Rejected for the flaw
Of being unforgiven
For being called
Out the darkness I crawled
As life retaliates
Against my life
Unworthy of living
Conduis-moi comme
Un agneau à l'abattoir
Je chagrin ma chair

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Goodbye Good Friend

Good friend
I could see it in your eyes
You looked so tired
Then I never saw you again
Until you were gone forever
Dressed to be buried
Your frozen frame displayed for all
In a pine box with soft velvet
People walking by crying
You laying there
Not sleeping
Your spirit flown
Walking away
No more pain
Winter always follows Fall
Seasons pass by
I can't say
I wish you were still here
You are now
On the other side
That has to be better
Than this place
Where all dreams go to die
If you are listening
I love you
I miss you