Sunday, December 31, 2017

The Black Swan theory

They say never to make judgments from the appearance of a black swan
They are rare, perhaps unique, so you never have any confidence
That what you've seen is rare, real, a mirage, or nothing at all
I have never met one, not for any reason, not even a liaison
If I did I'd close my eyes, for it would no doubt be forbidden
And I'd cover my ears to block her call
Because even if the most perfect black swan appears
You should never believe that it'll be true
It'll only bring sorrow
Or that you could count upon
It will be there tomorrow

Saturday, December 30, 2017

MiG Alley

Over contested ground
One force met another in violent action
Both put warriors into the sky
Met in the clouds
Over the combat zones
The pilots were veterans of a previous conflict
Where they were former allies
But now they fought alone
Against one another
And what did it achieve
Killing each other in the skies
Over a land often divided
Never united
Even 70 years past
No resolution
No peace
No trust

Play the scenario
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Friday, December 29, 2017


By your presence
I am washed with grace
My soul shivers in joy
As you grant me mercy
And I embrace this to my core
How does this ambrosia taste
Upon my gleeful lips
That your kiss does bring
The sun is eclipsed
Your scent so tempting
Your visage so exquisite
Elegance is your domain
Until you arrive I twist
It is you, who I adore
And I am tortured by desire
Fated by the gods to wait
I desire you more
Than this flesh can bear
I do not fetishize your beauty
For you are so much more
Than your assembled traits
Or features and skin
Your body is a chalice
Formed of the finest gold
Your words are the nectar within
And by sharing you tempt my heart
With such a loving soul
And in your gracious arms
I soar

Thursday, December 28, 2017

I am desire

POEM #2000

Promises spoken softly
Moonlight falling hard
Our lovely words shining
While our dreams soar
We know hope is costly
Our hearts become unguarded
The stars are aligning
Walking upon this shore
Your voice wakens me
Frees my spirit
I am fire
Alive in your love
Your choice saves me
And I am fearless
I am desire
You've filled my cup

Wednesday, December 27, 2017

She scares me still

Your beauty beckons
Your spirit reckless
Your mind able to untwist my tongue
You make me lose my timidity
And I long for you by the second
In a fashion, your flesh was a bee
And I've been stung
But your words so full of poison
Yet not toxic
I long for you, over and again
And still
I pull back
Pull back
Knowing the pain
From the wicked words
And the wild heart
I'll need to tame

(Dedicated to my wife of almost 30 years.)

Tuesday, December 26, 2017

Dust and lust

Tears of the fallen
Bitter and tragic
Refused the calling
Of their soul
Life most uncommon
Now turned ashes
Eternity dawning
And life turned cold
Earth to earth
Ashes to ashes
Dust to dust
Nothing left that matters
Our ashes are scattered
No longer flesh tempted by the lust
Whether for pleasure, or treasure
Leisure, or trust
Life becomes
After all
Returning to the earth
Where perhaps
Another will be born
Who breaks the curse

Monday, December 25, 2017


Angelic voices
The purity of the vision before me
My soul revealed
The absence of pain
The sound of comfort
Anthems singing
Death is nothing like living
But it is not meant to
Life is meant to be
The test
The struggle
The divination of spirit
From flesh
If it is easy
All will pass
If it is difficult
Only the faithful with attempt the path
Even to the death
And upon finding the truth
Their soul will last
Though the flesh fails

Sunday, December 24, 2017


We resist but time washes everything away
Including our dreams, including our hate
There is no defense against the flood
We are not unique, we are not insane
Our path is ever before us, not the direction we came
It is in our DNA, our blood
Humans are alive in this flesh for a moment
Best then to focus upon the good
The everlasting
And not life's torments

Saturday, December 23, 2017

By one breath, the universe had life

In the void there was nothing
But me
The silence was deafening
I longed to hear a voice
That was not my own
I longed for company
From others with names
From others who could speak
Without my knowing
What they might say
And with a blink of my eye
The universe existed
The mighty host of angels
Stood with ovation
With the sweep of my arm
I populated the stars
And with a breath
From my chest
I gave life
The universe is now wild
With the seed of creation

Friday, December 22, 2017


I looked but never touched
We were both adults
But I never behaved that way
She whispered my name
I turned away
But her words spoken
Left my heart broken
Did she mean to crush me
Did she want my death
Did she seek to hurt me
Did she want to place me on her shelf
Broken mirror
Broken glass
I refuse to surrender
But I am fading fast
I am flawed beyond measure
Yet still I try to be of honor
My life is not for sale
So forever now I wander
Because I've lost my way
And I am left to ponder
Why I do this to myself
She was lust made simplified
Aimed at making me backslide
Falling from my home
Leaving me all alone

Thursday, December 21, 2017

Oblivion has begun

In winter I dream of summer heat
In summer I long for the cold
Awash in the ocean I dream of the desert
And walking alone in a wasteland of sand
I would kill for a drink
I am asleep to my life in dream
And have no idea between shit or gold
In utero I wait for the  signal to abort
The worst nightmare is a construct of man
Where the reward goes to those who avoid the chance
To think
Opposites might attract
But the strong are tempted always to attack
I never resist the urge to run
My entry into oblivion
Is begun

Wednesday, December 20, 2017

Aware in that moment

I can't help but love her
For she's my lover
And I can't help but feel pain
For she has words that slay
And her wicked words are precise
Not casual, nor flawed
Such are the usual weapons
Found in the arsenal
Of every woman who
Refuses to take lies
Of the lover who
Is not whole
Removing the mask of the one
Who wears the disguise
She looks deep into his soul's eyes
Grabs and throws away the mask
And says Love me for me
As I love you for you
Be mine or not
But to your own self
Be true

Tu es mon coeur, mon amour pour toujours, 
et le plus grand d├ęsir de mon coeur.

Tuesday, December 19, 2017

Your gracious beauty is divine

In communion
I prayed to God
For your company
As my companion
That you'd enter my life
Blessed my existence
And now
I have no resistance
To your soft words
The touch of your paws
Your meow
Your form next to mine
Makes my being serene
Comforts my soul
And allows
My heart to reach
The stars
The universe
And all the cosmos
In between

Monday, December 18, 2017

There is only a promise, that I will be only me

When I caught your eye
You turned your face
I know the reason why
You looked away
You judged me, with disdain
Yet you approached
And called my name
Like a runaway train
A catastrophe ride
Ending in disgust
Broken glass
Stained by blood
Do you believe
Do you trust
All there is
Reality cuts
And be
Nothing lasts
Not even the flood
Of curses or blessings
Gifts received
Tend to fade
Youth burns hot
Like our lust
Who are you to look that way
All that I ever wanted
All that I ever could need
If you were mine
I'd never stray
I promise for you
I would bleed

Sunday, December 17, 2017

All that grieving

Pain was all the rage
Mental strength faded
My life was the most
Exquisite cage
And there was nothing
Nothing could be done
With my dreadful outlook
My features froze
With the moment
Of deepest despair
And then
There was nothing still
No matter what I offered
My sorrow burned
And life isn't fair
So why should it matter
Despair looks good upon me
And kindness and hope
Never redeemed
All that grieving

Saturday, December 16, 2017

Falling to earth

I fell from a place
Set so high in the stars
My return to earth
Caused oblivion
As all of my thoughts
Crashed burning
I remembered nothing
I thought nothing
All my lives were ended
With a single breath I rose
And my galaxies formed
And I swore
Before the universe
I'd return
In a new form
Without anger
But for now
I must sleep

Friday, December 15, 2017

can't hear it

the crying goes on
the dead can't hear it
the soul has flown
no chance to see the next dawn
a life lived well with spirit
now gone
but we should smile
and remember
what we had
not cry for
what we can no longer have
and in a while
we will join that soul
and never leave
what is born in flesh
never dies in spirit form
never dies or wears flesh
never to draw another painful breath
breathing only the highest air
of the highest heaven
surrounded by the souls aflight
at the festival of saints
in the end of time

Thursday, December 14, 2017

Ready and waiting for the harvest

For a long time
I wondered why I care
I spent the better part
Of five decades
Wondering why I failed
Wondered where
I could find a heart
Like mine
Not in any way athletic
Possessing no talents
Rejected by two fathers
Given up by one mother
Despised beyond casual dislike
Hated beyond my ability to despair
I chose to resist
What I do in this life
Follows me
Through out eternity
What I do for others
Helps them find the way
To that same place
Elysium awaits
It waits and destiny
Is a cloak
That covers
To shield the arrows
And shame
This life is far too much
I've had enough
So I wait
To see the fields of wheat
Drawn through my hand
I see the golden sunrise
The gentle wind
And know
The day will be good
For the harvest
It is reaped
Every day

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

Preventing wrath, saving the day

Take my hand
You don't need to die
I'll hold you close
And help you try
No need to drown
Waiting for the walls to fall
We can help each other
Until hope is gone
Is there anything to prevent the wrath
Is there anyone who is not insane
How can anyone see our path
Can anyone be free from pain
Will this time on earth pass
Time flies past the day
Shame and sorrow
Our hopes are dashed
Our children lose the way
We can pray to a god
Or believe in the dollar
We can be kind to our friends
We can hate all the others
This world is waiting for us
To rise and take a stand
What will we do
Will we be the ones
Or will we be made slaves
To the miseries of wage
Love one another
Find peace to share
Honor your blood
Your father and mother
Because you might have it good
But for others it isn't fair
Give your life
To be more
Than someone
Who is wasting days
Who is killing time
There is nothing we can do
Unless we change inside

Monday, December 11, 2017

Stupid facts

Think about it
Bombs cost millions
Lives cost nothing
Which is more precious to you?
Children with absolute brilliance
Die 20,000 a day of starvation
How do you accept that?
4 people per minute die
Of lack of food
While Americans are obese
That is obscene
I am fat
I live in comfort
And I am stupid
Because I watch
As others fall
Because they weren't born in a certain place
Or Wear a certain skin
And I feel shame
Because I was called to do more
With this thing I have
My life
And I don't
I don't do anything
While we lose
20,000 children
A day
Who starve
So stupid
I am stupid

Sunday, December 10, 2017


Her husband was slain
Hector of Troy his killer
She was beyond sorrow
And grieved for days on end
After prayer she chose a path
Building a bronze likeness of her man
She became devoted to his memory
When others intervened to stop her
From holding him up as her god
She joined the bronze statue
Upon the pyre
Rather than live
For now she had no desire
To exist without him in her life

Saturday, December 9, 2017

Harvest of Misery

Sorrow has a victory
Am alone in this shame
I whisper a prayer
Asking about the mysteries
Without answers
Fears that cannot be tamed
Isolation and silence
No one cares
As the heart
Harvests the misery
Close my eyes
Enter darkness
My time is done
Did deep
Place me in the grave
And leave me
And the cemetery

Friday, December 8, 2017

Cyanide Serenade

I am through
You are breaking me
You are making me
Want to die
Commit suicide
Drink a vial of poison
Eat an apple of cyanide
Let me go
Just let me do what I need
To survive
Just let me go
You drive me so
So very mad

Thursday, December 7, 2017


Why are we bestial
Will we ever become moral
Do we even care
Humans are not special
We are animals
We slaughter each other
And feed upon the marrow
Found in the bones
We make violence our temple
And we never rise above

Is there any hope
For humanity to ascend
Or are we meant to linger
In the morass of a moral dead end
Are we able to rise
Do we even care
Why do we bother
How do some transcend

Wednesday, December 6, 2017


I have no shame
Falling from the heights
Knowing my place
I had been upon the rise
The enemy knows my face
Despite my disguise
And chose to take
My life
But I am not made of flesh
I am still alive
Still alive

Tuesday, December 5, 2017

Naive revelations

I keep silent
My thoughts kept secretly
I am unwilling to bleed
For the pleasure of others
My heart broke repeatedly
Believing with trust
What was not true
What else could I do
She promised
Her love renewed me
But now I sit watching them
From a distance
Those who love one another
And realize how foolish
And very naive
I was

Monday, December 4, 2017

Lost place, Lost time

You might ignore the warnings
You may reject the fear
But it is a place of storms
Throughout the year
No one knows where it lays
Upon the map or upon the globe
It has slept for many eons
Its eyes closed, without hope
It lays in sweet repose
Where the sailors fell astray
Where their ships crash
They sleep where they lay
The lost place
In some lost time
Still exists behind the veil
It sleeps there
Salt encrusted
Ignorant of the gongs
And chiming chimes
That pass the days
Watching as the iron
From the ships
Becomes rusted

Sunday, December 3, 2017

the master

we call it time
but it isn't its name
it flows and twists
never starts or ends
it takes no prisoners
accepts no blame
it knows it is master
over all of our lives
it is death
it is life

Saturday, December 2, 2017

Falling Blossoms

Blossoms of fire
Fall and die
They died for the empire
And the emperor's desire
To save the land
The most sacred land
Of the gods

Friday, December 1, 2017

The Black Lightning Bolts

Barbed and Razor sharp
The camp is surrounded
The dead and dying
Rounded up
To be burned
And hid from view
Transformed from body 
Turned to ash
The winds carrying away
The final form
Of the innocent
Nothing left


Nothing to build upon
The death of the future
The final moment of life
Quickly passed

Thursday, November 30, 2017

Cold killers

The pack gathers
Hunts as one
Catches the scent
And begins
The alpha directs the strike
The slaughter begun
The snow turned red
Goes on without relent
And the cubs are fed
For another day

Wednesday, November 29, 2017

when sky breaks

They watch
From high places
But they are not worried
They've watched
They've existed
They expect no mercy
For the world below
That world moves
When it will
Arbitrarily or not
In summer heat
Or winter snow
They are fulfilled
By their calling
Because life goes on
Ever shining
Like stars in the belt of Orion
It will never fade
They are content
For they know there is more
Far more
And their role goes on
Ever silent
Ever true

Tuesday, November 28, 2017

Answer of Death

I surrendered
To the fear of existence
Long ago
I remembered
My punishments
At the hands of the twisted
The horrid bestial violence
That humanity has become
I do not still hope
To escape
For no one does
But I offer resistance
For while I am aware of my fear
Nothing changes
Nothing can change
Existence treads forward
And there is nothing I can do
Except die
In reply

Monday, November 27, 2017

Nothing but guilt

I ran from the memory
But they kept pace
I tried to oppose them
They melted my face
No hope in my heart
Nor in my mental state
Guilt was poured down
And I disappeared
Without trace

Sunday, November 26, 2017

Crying People Linger

Crying people linger
Upon the ground
Beneath three crosses
In the air,
A sweet scent of rain
The sky above, raging red
heavy clouds, swollen
As the water pours down
his body is cleaned
of the sweat
of the blood
and dust
He is still
but the crowd watches
in shocked silence
As the blood brings healing
Reunion and communion
And trust

Saturday, November 25, 2017

I moved

I moved in the bliss
of being in new love
I received the kiss
of having new life
I escaped the abyss
knowing I was alive
In the love
Of an angel
In the arms
Of heaven

Friday, November 24, 2017

Damnation Red

“What can an eternity of damnation matter to someone who has felt, if only for a second, the infinity of delight?” ― Charles Baudelaire

A rusted monolith
From a long passed industrial age
It never lived, but is skeletal and red
The colony was stripped
Of her precious resources
This led to a loss of oxygen
When the atmosphere fled
Due to decay of the machines
Without maintenance
Or care
The miners were mostly dead
But a handful escaped
The dead lay where they passed
The lack of oxygen
And the radioactivity
Keeps the colonies from returning
This was a disaster
The likes of which
The earthmen never knew
The monolith of rust
Weeps for knowing
That humans never learn
They'll find another planet
Strip it
And kill it
Never looking back

Thursday, November 23, 2017


I kissed those lips
I kissed a man
Not a God
I didn't do it because of love
But of jealousy
Not a bit of kindness
But of resentment
And hurt
No ecstasy, just the abyss
No gentleness, I am a fraud
When God above speaks
When Jesus prays
I refuse to obey
This is madness, blindness
No repentance
My heart is dead
So just give me my money
30 sheckels instead
And leave me alone
I have to go

Wednesday, November 22, 2017

Hated and Damned

Surrounded by the brokenness
The saints destroyed by the shame
Joining the fallen angels
and fallen dreams

Our foes face us emotionless
As our fears become inflamed
Cannot help but to step into the stream

The flowing Styx courses
The current ripping away our hold
Our destination Tartarus
Our flesh not burning, but cold

Why do we not change
Why are we seemingly condemned
To do the same thing, over and again
Damned by our descent

We are not fools
We are aware of our demise
Our fate shall be cruel
Our choices leave us despised

Tuesday, November 21, 2017

Continent Wide I've walked

At some point in time
It becomes obvious
This was the time
This was the hour
We served the greatest empire
And we are Roman
Like my father and his father before him
As my brothers and my village's young males
Serving is a privilege, not a duty
Rome existed and spanned the horizon
So great in distance, so great in power
Infantry wore down their sandals
And cavalry horses their shoes
The path was unpaved
The journey was dangerous
We were not promised safety
Rather, glory, and reward
We served the Empire
We sought to make it strong
We fought, explored and conquered
From shore to shore
From Caledonia and Britannia
To the boundaries of Partha
Every day a Roman dawn
Our path crossed the empire
And at its height
We were invincible
Constant war made our skills sharp
No other empire dared challenge
No, it wasn't another empire
It was those who formed tribes
And chose to fight
For their own people
And as we sharpened our skills
In battle
They sharpened their desire
To destroy us
I am now a sacred spirit
Who watches
As the world forgets
The greatness
That was Rome



"It is easier to find men who will volunteer to die, than to find those who are willing to endure pain with patience." Julius Caesar