Undeserved Infamy

In the present
The acts of the past
Have been open for debate
But self defense is not bigoted
Fighting an invader
Does not condemn you to infamy

Canceled

If you didn't love me
You should have let me know
Otherwise my heart is being fooled
You made your choices
And your real views showed
My membership card should be removed

Begging for Armageddon to Finally Strike

It isn't fear
It isn't trust
It is the hate for the modern
In the end, it comes from disgust
Not tears
Not time gone by
Without clarity
We desire to end it all
Forever and amen
Not faith
Not hope
Not charity

Modern Lies

Hannibal Barca was a brilliant general
Whether he was black or white, or even brown
The modern world gets it wrong once again
It mattered not to the people of the day
He was a Berber or a Phoenician
He was savior of Carthage
Defender of the colonies
Loved for the battles he was able to win
And he was hated by Rome
For the losses they suffered
He was hated or loved
But for his excellence in battle
Not his fucking color of skin

The final escape

I am content with existence
I don't want to be famous
By parts cautious, some dangerous
I've been curious, now you're furious
Walked the wall, Madness was the name
Called insane, by people filled with shame
I do wear a disguise, but not to deceive
It is because we all live in a masquerade
Madness steals your hope to believe
Making you wait for the final escape

Let's look at you now

Suppose you are somehow valuable
Imagine that your words bring hope
What is there that makes you dream
What is there allowing you to ascend
Are your thoughts somehow different
Are your ways somehow holy
Or is it all just random in the end?

Remember to fear him

The ancient people of the lands
Knew well his fearsome voice
The beings who served his wrath
Were never allowed any choice
He was supreme, and wicked
His power was manifest
And nothing we do
Not by word, not by act
Can save us from his reign

Grain

There they stand straight up
Turning their face to the sun
The warmth swells the grain
The sky provides the rain
Rise they rise
Reveling in God's domain
Creator, maker, and bringer of life
How great is thy name

Alone, Crying

In a Chinese railroad station
Bombed with malice and hate
A single child remains there
Crying, alone, in pain
The shame of war
Her mother lays dead
Unmemorialized by the world
For her terror is over
But the child now faces
A life lived alone
With no home
Modern men never relent
Modern men reveal no remorse
And the only regrets are for
Personal loss
Regardless of the soul's cost

Capturing a storm

They flew, without relent
Eating everything before them
They covered us, flying in swarms
We ran in panic
Not even waiting for end of rain
They came without warning like a storm
Covered eyes, mouths and every inch of lens

Celestial, Ancient Mountain King

Atop the mountain tops
A celestial king prepares the way
For the tides of time are constant
And he is akin to a God
To those who believe in this power
Who see him day to day
And no human can speak the king's name
For it is confusing, and untamed
It is only odd
To believe in a dragon
If you've never seen lightning
Never heard thunder
Never felt the earth quake

Ancient, Righteous, Beautiful

Cranes fly softly aloft
As Fuju watches the activity
And closes his eyes tonight
But you must never question
Who is or ever was ready
To know the things Fuju has seen
He knows, more than he wants
But his knowledge doesn't edify
It haunts
And Fuju refuses to know more
But at his core
Is a faith that is inexorable
A faith immutable
Powerful, manifestly beautiful
And unwilling to flee
Even if it would comfort his heart

Snow, Mountains, Quiet

In this place there is only quiet
Constant snow and gentle dreams
The people barely speak
Content to be silent
In the face of existence
They prefer to sleep
But they are alive
Ready to believe

The Guardian Fortress

Snow and winds have worn the walls away
Aged and formidable still, it watches the day
Like a guardian preventing attack from forces
To go around isn't difficult for the horsemen
And the walls remain in place, steady, thick
Constructed of stone, boulder and even brick
Defending the people, the lord, they've fought
The watchmen in the tower, upon the walls
Dare not daydream nor linger in thought,
They are dutiful, always answered the call

Gateway

I am aware that the path of eternity is wrought
Wrought with danger, sowed with pain
Each smile balanced with tears
I do not slow in step
Because I refuse to be burdened with fear
Over and over we see the signs,
We must be blind to not see
Every foot step walks where we've walked
Every thought thinks what has been thought
I am unable to sacrifice enough to be worthy
But worthiness isn't a concept that can be bought
We are not new, nor individually unique in worth
But to achieve a state of existence
Knowing that there is a way
Allows the sorrows to be healed
A gateway beckons
A gateway of truth

Existence fading

After years of living, I've come upon a truth
No matter what I try, I'm neither wise nor holy
I've lived more as a vagabond than as a saint
I believe human life has potential for good
But more than anything we might be
Violent and endlessly foolish
We are going to die
We are forsaken
We are doomed
And we choose our path to alleviate pain
Choosing the way that allows us to thrive
But most of us are burning and grieving
Barely able to survive, so I choose hope
For I was birthed from my mother's womb
Giving me a chance, against all of life's foes
I know it might lead nowhere I choose to believe
But I am aware that there is no way to fully know
That existence is worth the sorrow
That existence is worth care

Too much

They promised us that this'd be the end of war
We'd never see our children leaving, joining the fight
The end of hatred, the beginning of a new age, hope
They couldn't tell between France and Zanzibar
Or between black and white, or day and night
We've finally reached the end of our rope
Maybe I'll make it into a noose

Soaking Wet

Wet, soaked through by the thunderstorm's tears
We held each other, and remembered all the years
Scent of the rain and our bodies just like jasmine
Feel of our bodies, next to each other, like satin
When you feel the love, everything feels perfect
But even if your vision isn't perfect
Clarity doesn't come from the senses
Soaking wet might make you cold, or feel clean
Scent of street and rain might include gasoline
You make it through, because you know how to
It works somehow, whatever you are going through
Because love makes things better
No matter the weather
It creates the moment
Holding onto that is impossible
And somehow we're still here
After 30 more years

The Storm

It is there, and we can see it
Drawing near, becoming aware
We see it forming
But clarity is rare in the storm
Even the eye of which is clouded
Depths of power rise, bringing forth risk
A mournful sound pulses as the children cry
Some of the adults take aim to explain
What cannot be described, nor understood
Asking why this great event beckons
They believe that this is punishment
They do not deserve
As is the toll of a catastrophic event
Men and women alike come to wrath
With growing rage towards the danger
Some are fools, and take no warning
Some call themselves brave but are not
Others deny that the storm lurks when it does
So many watch in anger
Elders and children begin to sing
Songs to their gods and faith
Trying to impart hope to some
Hoping to avoid the final cost
Knowing that lives can be lost
For the want of knowing
Will it destroy everything
Will it pass meekly by
The people are waiting
And no one knows a thing

When the wind screams

Humans once viewed us all as their friends
Only until they realized that we are their end
Destroying all of their castles and walls
Our reign is sealed, never to be forestalled
They live but their lives are devoid of myth
We killed their gods, with abject prejudice
They cry with sorrow for the loss of magic
Our breath destroys with a power volcanic
The rumbling Aearth portents human death
As the winds scream, our destination reached
Burning villages, flame comes from our breath
Human walls are too thin, they've been breached 
We are wise, knowing our place in this world
Humans of the Aearth formerly would dream
We control the planet, more so with every turn
We provide epic nightmares for their sleep
Once upon a time they say, when we were free
Fearing us, they fled, we are their doom
Their end approaches, they unable to be redeemed
Aerth is ours, humans will be made extinct soon
They fear us for our legends, as is right
For they know that we are their masters
Flying above them, they turned to the knights
But their armies are forsaken, we bring disaster
This is humanity's last night

“I do not care what comes after; I have seen the dragons on the wind of morning.” 
Ursula K. Le Guin

Black Angels Falling

Some recall that the Bible said, Locusts with stingers for tails would rise from the earth, and thereafter fall down upon the people below. Are they our curse, No, we are by far greater, and our wickedness has long been sown.  Grieving the deaths of humanity, the innocents soon are overwhelmed.  For we are given much to fear, and scant little to contemplate.

False evidence that our existence is forsaken, leaves us alone, and forgetful of truth. Those with malice alive in their hearts will flee.  The rise from the earth of machinations looking like insects, will seem like doom, to any army. Armageddon will set fire to this present day, we must remember, a future is not written, there are no guarantees.  We fall upon our knees, knowing the executioner comes in haste.

Despite the terror, there remains reason to believe.  Despite the self inflicted pains as the world falls apart, as humans lose empathy, with souls covered with scars, we can only pray, hope, and move forward. If we cannot live in the present,  if we are unable to seize every day, we pull down upon us torment, the sort of which offers no escape, save through hope, and redemption.

Invite Defeat

Life has a way of dismembering
The body and means by which we live
By the end of our time spent here
We've forgotten our purpose
Forsaken and unable to remember
And even how to forgive
While those we love disappear
As we hide behind the curtain
We have no reason to endure
Having burned everything for heat
Even with our motives pure
We will invite defeat

Love is, Love is not

Love in the extreme is something that is awesome
It causes belief, it fills the dreams, hope blossoms
Absence of love leads to the same in the exact opposite
Losing belief in all things, cannot dream, disconsolate
I'd rather be in love
Even if the love isn't enough

Late Autumn Snow

The mist and snow hover
Coating the empty branches
Reminding us of forest fires
Sharing the sky with ashes
Blessing the morning
Covering the world with a blanket
True, life could be beautiful
Still the lives lived are often tragic


“Love. Of course, love. Flames for a year, ashes for thirty.”  Giuseppe Tomasi di Lampedusa

The Realm of Faeries Has Been Lost

Where there once was a queen
Now there is absence, a vacant throne
With faer blood pulsing in her veins
Her courage spectacular, endless
We'd bear upon our shields, her name
We've fought with glory
We've given lives
We persist
Our queen is sacred
So is this, which is her land
We fought without failing
But we've only so many
And with our domains all taken
We've nothing more to give
But our flesh for our queen
And soon
This land will pass before the mists
Forever in time

“For whatsoever from one place doth fall,
Is with the tide unto an other brought:
For there is nothing lost, that may be found, if sought.”
 
Edmund Spenser

Infamy beckons

Do you resolve your issues with words or violence?  You don't understand why peace should be the highest priority, or it is?

If you begin an argument saying I won't use war unless I have no other choice, you are saying you will use war.  Because nothing is going to sound rational, able to be solved, if you choose violence as one of those means.

But what if you refuse to change your course and the enemy attacks?  Well then you don't have the luxury of choosing.  Do you?

Angel Mourning

The day is ended, her body interned
Our memories cannot be burned
We know no reason to go on
But we try
She was so beloved
Even the angels are mourning
This was our gathered family
Together one last time

Beneath An Auburn Colored Sky

Looking up to the clouds and sun
Hanging in an auburn colored sky
While I am tired, so tired of the pain
Getting called foolish, even insane

I've spent my life asking why
Why am I left broken, yet all others are chosen
Why am I just sleeping when others are dreaming

I never become sullen or cry
But the question demands an answer
Why are evil men perfectly healthy
When saints of all kinds get deadly cancer

Am I speaking to God or am I endlessly screaming
Without any other soul able to hear

Why do I force everyone from being near,
When I need comfort, compassion and respite
From a life I've woven of tears and precious little else

I live in a world of sorrow
Every soul needing more love
Begging from our present
Leaving no tomorrow
We need love and little else
And I know, because, I have nothing left

Choosing Eternity

I try to embrace the offer of living

I'd be lost without others forgiving

Life can wound us, but we can heal

In an absurd, insane world, so surreal

Refuse the attraction of death over life

Know there is more to this than the ride

We have there only endings, nightmares

But hope requires dreams, we need to care

Our lives are mysteries and masquerade

Thorns and hammered nails showed the way

This existence will not fade

There is a promise

Rather it will transcend into a new form

Rising in ascent, embrace the coming storm

For we are eternal if we choose to be

Decay

Would that we've gathered forces to slay an enemy of our planet
However we've learned that Earth has been killed
In large measure by what we've done
It is by our hands that it has been killed
We are the curse
It will only show signs of life
When we are gone
Let the Exodus begin
Run humans
Run

Not Enough

We gave them our innocence
We gave them our justice
We gave to them our children
Our offerings were not enough
When we pledged our  fidelity
We offered our last memories
Allowed our fields to go fallow
There fell from grace, lost our love
By trusting we betrayed our faith
By our trust to those not faithful
Awoken from nightmare and dream
Unthinking, sleepwalking undone
We made gods of our lustful desires
Refused to fight for those who couldn't
We tried to hide to escape our choices
Losing victory that was already won
We gave back the graces
Given freely
Spat upon the mercy offered
Because we were wrong
Now we've lost and there's nothing
Not even voices, we only know to run
We didn't know to how to cry
Neither tears of bitter remorse
Nor tears of true repentance
And we then knew
Our hearts were completely dry
We gave them our innocents
We gave them unworthy trust
We gave them our children
The sacrifices were not enough

“The past could always be annihilated. Regret, denial, or forgetfulness could do that. But the future was inevitable.” Oscar Wilde

The words of a prophet

Then there a man came
He was thought to be a prophet
Without any name
He was remembered for only words
He asked
How much is a life worth
Does suffering add or debit
Do we know our way
Is life a blessing or curse
Words are weapons
Life is a maze without exit
And love has become shame
Are we a blessing to this earth
Or is love a relic, and we are the menace
Our world will pass before our eyes
Wrath and torment, beckons
As this and every civilization
Painfully dies in flame
And with everything that lives
There will be endless suffering
So now and forever after
Abject, total, absolute and fetid decay

lies

If the sun refused to rise
You'd still have to hide your eyes
You lie so often I am shocked by truth
Never for the right, never for the good
So tell me why I should believe
When lies are all I ever receive
From you

The Cost of Telling the Truth

Ovid of Rome was a man who spoke the truth
But he was aware that anything he said
Might well mean he was censored
He might offend a ruler, or the masses
By words
Truth was a fire inside, it burned
And when he was exiled for words
A concept of thought, so absurd
He knew
He was sent far away
To contemplate his errors
And was never allowed to return


"'Conscia mens recti famae mendacia risit'
'The mind, conscious of rectitude, laughed to scorn the falsehood of report.'
Ovid

The tapestry

Love is a tapestry
Woven in perfect stitch
It persists forever
Threads of golden silk
Sewn upon your heart
Written in perfect ink
Love leaves attachments
And yes
Love makes you bleed
Love can be a catastrophe
If all you want is to leave
But love fulfills
It does not hollow you
Love endures
Love soaks the whole way through
Every piece of artifice
Every moment you lied
Every fear you let live
Until the point you collide
With knowing the truth
You have no choice
It is between living and dying
Inside

Scimitar bearers

Our blades are sharp
They are like the crescent stars
We call them scimitars and they are curved
They serve us, as we serve our lord
The foe calls dogs or worse, pigs of war
But we are aware of our true identity
We are neither saints, nor sinners
Servants of the blade
Of our Master
In this service we might die
While the survivors bear the scars
They also bear the memories of lineage,
Duty and honor is our legacy
Upon the ramparts there
We extinguish the fires
Set by rebels and barbarians
Defend the fortress against harm
We serve our purpose
Created an empire
Offering up our bone
Our blood
Muscles, life and arms
Keeping our citizens civilized
While standing against the rising tide
Of those who seek to destroy, rape, or pillage
No we cannot tame them, they'll always be wild
But someone must defend against the approach
Like a dam holds back the waters rising in the flood

We are not thankful

We believe in the perfection of the species

We wonder why our actions do not succeed

We are grateful for our comforts and leisure

Our world is impermanent and so are we

We will kill one another, for the revelry 

We will slaughter a brother in abject greed

We will murder one another for treasure

Or for our visceral pleasures 

We will do as we will seek 

Whatever we might find

And by our hand's unholy act

 “…So when the last and dreadful hour
This crumbling pageant shall devour,
The trumpet shall be heard on high,
The dead shall live, the living die,
And Music shall untune the sky”
― John Dryden

Remnant Life

Our flesh has faded
The meat removed from the bone
The blood has flowed
From a body broken and jaded
When we are gone
No one will remember
But our flesh dismembered
And our dreams made to feel
Foolish
And deflated
A box of bones all that remains
We should have known better
But the decay is persistent
There is no resistance

Protect the Egg, Save the Species

The ancient one protects the young
Her vigilance allows the race to prosper
Shield the egg or invite oblivion
Stand against the egg thieves
Eternity beckons the ancient
As life beckons the young

Protegit pullos antiquo
Ea vigilantia esse concedit stadio prosperatur;
Oblivionem vocat ovum aut scuto
Stare adversus fures ovo
Fatisque vocantia antiquis aeternum 
Ut puer vita vocet

“How should we be able to forget those ancient myths that are at the beginning of all peoples, the myths about dragons that at the last moment turn into princesses; perhaps all the dragons of our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us once beautiful and brave. Perhaps everything terrible is in its deepest being something helpless that wants help from us."  Rainer Maria Rilke

If I were you

If I were you I'd wonder why
Each time I said I love you
It made you want to cry
If I were you, I'd ask again
Every time I was heart broken
Why you had acted as if I 'd sinned
You treated me with a special sort of malice
You refused to ask forgiveness
You've shattered our love's chalice
So I wonder why
I'd wonder why if I were you
That there is nothing left
So much sorrow
That you need to know the truth

no pretense

Yes I know
I said I want you but
what I meant was
something very
very
different
you see I was so afraid
but I felt a sync of spirits colliding
knowing what life was saying
yet
wanting so desperately to know
how to spend a moment
without regret
how to live without pretense
ever an ending
without resentment
I love you
I want you
and that
just makes it worse
so much worse
than the present
resolution to abandon
hope, or honor
just be together
without forever
beckoning in the distance

You

I remember when I loved you in a way that would seem in retrospect
To be something that is deeply introspective, imperfect, but kind
While I could never see how, I know it burned inside with a perfect light
It was aimed at you in a power and fire, that never died
Never has it faded, even through the years
Not even through all of our tears
Truth endures and goes on that we need each other,
And most deeply, we love what is inside
This love will go on, and on, forever unto the farthest mile
Forever and fantasy restored
This love dragged me from the depths, so Stygian
Upon a trajectory heavenward rather
And it might never have been sealed, memorialized
But for spoken words before friends
And family
And God

Venus

She taught all she knew, to live every moment
To enjoy life, to love others, to live without regret
She was amazing, an unique sort of beauty
Her skin was so soft, so pure, so perfect
Her hair was lush, it moved exquisitely
Her voice was a tapestry of magic
Memorable, unforgettable, immutably striking
All who knew her desired her
Or desired to be like her
But none ever would
Or could

Differently

They tell us to believe them
When they've lied every time
Each time previous to this
They'd like for us to panic
When they've tried and tried
To tell us we are full of shit
We know something different
But not if you listen to them
Think for yourselves
The liars will lie
Will say anything
And never ever repent

Has it ever mattered?

Does it matter where we are going
Has it ever?
Does it matter what we do
All I ever wanted
Was to tame this heart so wild
Was to find what is true
Now I find that I will never
Find the truth
Or anything even worthwhile
We are left behind trying to know
What we never will
It doesn't matter if you try
There is nothing to learn
You begin and then you go
You desire and yearn
You get old and tired

Memories

I walked upon the shores of the distant lands, the clouds were thick, and the ocean washed across my feet.  Toes digging into the sands, I remembered when the baby kicked, we thought the future was secure, so sweet.

I miss you since the day, and miss you all the time.  We were young and didn't care.  But now I am old, and quite resigned, to the fact I'll never see you again.  Sometimes I think life isn't fair, but I know, your spirit remains.

I will never be who I thought I was meant to be.
Because without you here, there is nothing.
And there will never be.
Again.

Red Skies, Black Crosses

Above the frozen ground below
Pilot breath, as if airborne frost
The eagles above fight for life
Bleeding and dying for the land
Awarded for the valor to show
Medals of a red star or iron cross
A political struggle, a racial strife
The blood is equally upon their hands
From the finest each warrior chosen
Talented men chosen for war
Making each contest a tragedy
For to win, one other must die
No hope to survive, the air is frozen
The event of battle leaving scars
Dogfighting and dodging, agilely
Heroes and villains filled the sky