Welcome


I am a poet who has both been published and self published. All work on this blog is all copyright Alex Ness. While I make very little money from my work I am technically a professional. Measuring by the hours I've written I am professional. My goal is to share my work with as many people that can read it, as far as the internet may reach with it. I hope if you are moved you will share this blog with others, and perhaps buy my books.

Whatever the result, thank you for viewing this blog. I cannot express how greatly I appreciate the many people, from many places upon the earth, who have visited.

I bid you peace.

Je ne regrette pas la douleur, car il m'a fait plus forte

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Saturday, October 30, 2010

CHASE


I chased you through the snow fields
Ran across the crust of white
I saw your prints upon the ground
Your scent embedded in my breath
As if frozen in ice
I would remember you
No matter how long
No matter how far
I’d have to run
To glimpse your face
To be embraced
I would follow you
The icy cold breath
Frozen in my lungs
Running til my chest would burst
The cold made my extremities burn
But I would follow you
Without end
Relentless is my hunger
For your being
I yearn
I will find you
And your kisses
Will be earned

Señora de la madera, mi corazón está roto por el toque



We laid in splendor
Held in the other’s arms
In the days we spent
I never ever thought
We’d be apart
Now we are
And there is nothing
Only the silence
Of my thoughts
And rain
Tears falling
And pain
Hands wringing
No children singing
No miracles
Just an old man thinking
How he’d rather be gone
We used to be young
Our love was wild
And then you left
I cannot get up
From falling down
And won’t
I will make this ground
My death bed
And won’t move
Death won’t take long
And then I can sleep
Forever
Without you
Not even
In my dreams

Thursday, October 28, 2010

PAINTED BLACK



I shivered the moment I saw you
I knew something was different
I could see it in your spirit
So beautiful, so true
In your eyes I saw children
Our souls entwined would create
My desire for you was not lust
But a committment to a belief
That our life together was destiny
We’d build a legacy
Of love, of hope, and trust
But it never happened
No children
No moments forever
To remember
And I am left
Alone, as ever
For I refuse to accept
What I am left
Rather than what
I should have had
Farewell
Farewell
My heart will be painted
Black

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Burn

screaming answers
that burn like fire
filled with cancers
of society’s desires
we are the youth
without birth
we are the ones
who bear the cross
of the burdens
of those never
begun
burn in us
burn in us
like a storm
raging out of control
with flame instead of rain
burn in us
our veins bear your mark
we are the ones
who bear your message
burn in us
brand my heart
burn
let it burn
and may our ash
be the gentle ground
for a new world
at last
we will be done
and returned
to where this
was begun

Emptied Within

Cannot count the tears
Pouring in endless
Streams
Can’t count the fears
Of being left
For dead
Unredeemed
What did I do
What could I do
But what I did?
You wanted more
Than I could give
You needed more
Now I am emptied
Within
For you
I gave everything
And then you left me
For the want of more
But I was emptied
And there is nothing left
To give
To give
But I forgave
Because love doesn’t keep score
But you are still gone
And there is no comfort
From that closed door
Now the solitude
Humbles my hopes
For there is no sanctuary
In loneliness
And again I wonder
Why you left
And still I wonder
What did I do
My hopes are gone
They left with you

Monday, October 25, 2010

You are my Quest

My heart is stained
More red than crimson
My eyes are tired
From crying before
The morning sun
Nothing I can say
That I haven’t said before
Not a lot to do
That hasn’t all been done
When it is about love
I don’t keep score
When it is about love
I don’t care if you hide or run
If I love you it is all I am
If you love me
Let it be begun
This life is meaningless
Without you
Away from you
There’s only doubt
With you I am complete
And I promise to you
I will give you a love
Sacred
I will be devout
Filled with desire
Hope and forgiveness
And faithful throughout
For your love is redemption
And love is all there is

SINCE YOU WENT AWAY



Telling me a joke
May make me seem elated
I tell everyone who asks
I am so happy
And I refuse to act as if I’m down
But the truth is out there waiting
To make the lie well known
Since you’ve been gone
There is nothing worth doing
There is nothing worth being
And you haven’t been gone long
These wounds won’t heal
And there is nothing, nothing
That can make me feel
As if life is worth living
Because you were all
And that is enough
For me
Streaming tears remind me
It isn’t going to change
Without you here
My life is empty
Without you near
I can’t turn a page
Because you were all
And that was enough
For me

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Spent a year thinking

I spent the last year thinking
And I am still unsure
How it could have happened to me
My heart was never so certain
And then you left
And unloved me
Unneeded me
Unwanted me
Took my heart with you
That I'd given freely
And now I have nothing
And you are gone

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Iberian Fire


Crimson red the flag was
Standing atop the hill
The Loyalists to the Republic
Waited for the blood to spill
When the Monarchists
And their allies of fate
Along side of the butchers
Collaborators against the state
From Fascist regimes
The German Condor Legion
The Italian force
Corpo Truppe Volontarie
Poured into the valley
Supported by planes
Bombing the innocent
Destroying
Iberia enflamed
The terror of the war
Came not from the battle
But from the hatreds exposed
Between ideologies
Between neighbors
Between modernity
And the ancient regimes
Many fought for a cause
Some were forced to fight
In the end war would go on
And the land and people
Bled until white



Thursday, October 21, 2010

Never Let Me Go



Never let me go
Never let me go
I pray you never let me go
Please
You moved me
You saved me
You made me dream
I found serenity
In your arms
When I sleep
I see you there
Dancing atop the sky
Playing amongst the stars
My heart is full with you
I saw happiness
Because you loved me
I long to be held
Forever now
Into eternity
In your arms
So comforting
I pray you find me too
The way I want you
Being moved by me
Afire with my charms
You are all I desire
You create my inner fire
I become alive
Never growing tired
Because you love me
I certainly
Search for you
Whenever I sleep
In your embrace I dream
Even in my sleeping hours
I desire you
You are graceful
You possess divinity
I long for you
Every second
Every minute
Every hour

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Le Paris Métro



Read a poetry book by E. Pound
Smoked two packs of cigarettes
Drank a pot of coffee with cream
Early May 1988 Le Paris Métro
Waiting for her in the noisy station
Coffee to stay awake
While sitting slumped in a chair
A nearly empty cafe
I knew she’d never come but
Still I waited until the gates were closed
And the cleaning staff with brooms
Pushed me out
No matter that I’d waited
No matter that I’d been the one
She said that she loved me
But it wasn’t true
I spent a lifetime waiting
I spent a lifetime praying
For her to be mine
I did everything I was asked
Jumped through every hoop
Short of suicide
Gave her every ounce
Still she didn’t love me
I was so tired
If I’d said I loved her
It wouldn’t matter in the end
All there was, was heartache
From dreams I could no longer have
Not allowed
Any more
Never again
Because I loved her
And she was too proud
To ever love another
So
What was the point of trying
You end up tossed aside
Laying upon the floor
Dying from lack of love
Crying from lack of love
The end was begun
For without her
Loving me
I was done

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Trapped



The whalers
Ignoring all warnings
They hunted long after the Summer
When the sun kept the pack ice
From forming
Hunted into the Autumn
Because the money from the harvest
Kept their employers warm
They reaped a slaughter
And sowed disaster
For on the Autumn wind
The winter storms came
And brought the ice pack
Back
And with it
Their ship became trapped
Their slaughter was worthless
As they froze in their beds
Waiting for Spring
Starving for comforts
Their faint hopes fled
With every reminder
Of how far they remained
From their home shores


Monday, October 18, 2010

Spider



The poison within
Infection begins
Starting from the site
From where the two collide
You never thought of me
How your love would strike
Weakening my resolve
The devastation bleeds me white
You never think
When you are about to hurt
You never care
That you make my life worse
This world is cold
Your love is never kind
Selfishly hunt for more
Destroying hearts like mine
You consume me
You drive my faith to despair
You create disillusion
As you pull me into your lair

Thursday, October 14, 2010

NOT A ROOM FULL OF GOLD AND TREASURE



Not a room full of gold and treasure
Not one hundred slaves at your ready
To bring you pleasure
Not silks and furs and pillows of down
For your total leisure
Are worthy of your presence
Your being is kissed softly
By perfumes and scents
But they do not add to your beauty
For perfect is infinite
You are that and so much more
Angel of the desert
Rose of the garden
Flower of my soul
I am not worthy of you
When you smile
Doves fly above the desert
In wild exultation
When you cry
Ravens call from dying trees
And in all the world
Dreams die
That you might love me
Gives me wings
Able to be wild
Rather than tamed
That you might call my name
Gives me hope
The kind about that angels sing
The kind that lets my heart rise up
Instead of being lamed
By my being
So unworthy
The hope of you alone
Redeems me
Fully
Completely

Sunday, October 10, 2010

A Raven Flies Towards Glastonbury Tor



A raven flies quickly
Adjacent to a storm
That gathers, so darkly
Over Glastonbury Tor
The site where Arthur was laid
Next to Gwenifar
His queen in death
Lover in life
They sleep still
Though hidden elsewhere
For the day when
Arthur will breathe
Air born
Of Albion’s sky
The raven knows
To go to the Abbey
Standing in memory
Upon a hill
Covered in mist
So beautiful
Looking like an island
That some called
Avalon

Read more Arthurian Legend @

Excalibur, Song of Albion



Held by the Lady of the Lake
Awaiting the king
The son of Uther
No doubt of king ship
Would remain
Made of ancient forge
By the elders of the Fae
Who knew there would be a day
When the race of man
Would need a king
And the King’s hand
A King’s sword
Qu'il avoit cainte Escalibor,
la meillor espee qui fust,
qu'ele trenche fer come fust"
Excalibur
Sword of Kings
King Arthur
Lord over men
Albion sings
For Arthur’s hand
Holding the sword
Excalibur
Albion
Arthur’s land
Will answer
Will rise
When Arthur calls
Again

Find more Arthurian Legend @

Saturday, October 9, 2010

sands and time



Relentless
The seconds go by
Lost to our touch
Inexorable
They flee so quickly
Forever they go
Time marches
Continuously
Without forgiveness
Without reuse
Seconds of time
Scream
Are like grains of sand
Flowing and fleeting
Far beyond our reach
And their passing
Leaves us
Older
Aged
Vanquished
Defeated
Until there is no time

Thursday, October 7, 2010

It stands in Rub' al Khali



A plume of sand raises and twists
In the midst of the Rub' al Khali
Where nothing except nothing exists
The winds of desert carry dust
And the heat sucks air from lungs
Nothing living can survive there
Where the bleak landscape drowns life
No faerie songs are sung
The only sound that thrives
Is that of blowing sands and wind
And blazing heat
No life can be wrung
From a land selfishly dry
Selfishly hot
In the center of nothing
Where life is prohibited by the waste
Stands a tall citadel and structure
Made entirely of gold
The halls luxurious with fibers
Untrodden by feet with shoes
The walls decorated with tapestries
Made of silk and gold and perfect hues
No one knows who made it
The knowledge solely possessed by eternity
It stands where life shouldn’t be
And offers succor to the weak

Chapter One

"Come, come, whoever you are.
Wanderer, worshipper, lover of leaving — it doesn't matter,
Ours is not a caravan of despair.
Come, even if you have broken your vow a hundred times,
Come, come again, come."

Rumi

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Hope is Gossamer Thin


I was with you in the abyss
When you fought demon hordes
I was with you in the midst
Of the celestial wars
And you slept to recover
I was there too
Distant yes
But still your lover
From the start
I spoke your name
But you simply heard words
Before you woke
From the deepest sleep
I swam in the oceans of your dreams
I lingered in the echoes of your heart
I saw the hope so far off
The broken shell
That held you tight
Opened now and shattered
From the light
You screamed silently
For someone to help
And opened your eyes
Reluctantly
Quietly
From your hell
Your life begins
As mine ends
At the edge of darkness
Where the light is faint
And your heart mends
The ones who dance in the distance
Who charm you and desire your fall
Are reasons enough to go on
For hope is ethereal
Hope is gossamer thin
But beauty is more
Than some desire within
It is real
It exists
To offer you hope
So go on and live
While it is my turn
To enter the mist
Of the gray lands
Of sleep

Friday, October 1, 2010

The glass is broken

The breath of the dead
Lingers in the echoes
Of the moments they lost
Frozen in time
The glass was broken
The blood poured in
From outside walls
Seething in sin
The bugs crawled
With their foul descent
Across the skin
Seeking the heat that laid
Deeply within
Diseased and vulgar
Screaming nightmares
Alive to life
Hiding in view
Without invite
My skin is crawling
Towards the vein
My memories are fading
I might live
Again