Events have no motive nor reason beyond just to be
The world screamed in horror, we'd soon cease to be
Flashing lights, impending impact, comets soon fall
Between beginning and end, darkness will soon call
A season, an Angel of Death reigned, blood legacy
A bitter escape, we found that way blocked and yet
Children we've never met learned our fate, our story
She had called me to remind me
That I had forgotten to call back
My mistake was answering
She wasn't listening to me now
My mind refused to be attacked
Try to tell me why I did not hang up
I listened to her scream, her tone was the answer
I was patient, calm, she became more enraged
The world she'd imagined made her queen
Consider this my revolution
I refuse to surrender my dreams
Nor obey a tyrant
Who screams rather than dialogue
With someone who was not an equal
My journey covered the world as then known
Crossing rivers, oceans, forests and deserts
Chasing the one's path, who'd stolen a throne
With weapons hand held or thrown in combat
Covered in an armor of chain and full helmet
Chasing one who'd fled over dust and bones
Who used a land's features to aid the escape
Hiding overnight by a gloom of open tombs
In time I would find the thief and must him
In transit across the land of Eurasian climes
Dangerous land, filled with dangerous tribes
But if the thief could live, I must at last ride
The world sometimes is new
But the life I had was a wound
I might've died without you
But you were just a cat
No one understood
In the middle of the abyss
You gave love freely
Without you, I'd sorrow
Overwhelmingly
Without truth
I'd no happiness left
Je te fais mes adieux
All my dreams retold
For with you I was blessed
And I will always be so
All because of you
Thank you, thank you
Farewell forever Mischa
You were a beautiful companion
And you blessed me in hope
My cat Mischa laid upon my chest after a serious drug interaction. Both prescribing doctors denied it, but it led to serious complications. Meanwhile I was sweating but frozen through, and my Mischa comforted me, when she too, was seriously ill. She passed less than a year later. I was fortunate to get through.
I watch as my flesh is removed, pieced out like a jigsaw puzzle
Feeling no pain, no shame, nothing matters inside of this place
Life's cage was meant to prevent freedom, pointless to struggle
I stare into a mirror, see a criminal, call it brother, we embrace
On awareness of imprisonment, I will smile as I am knowing
My flesh's dead, but my mind and spirit yet flourish, decoding
A future is uncertain, a past burns in sorrow, there's only now
My flesh was consumed, now a being entombed
My curse of being mummified, no life to abide
The Princess, my heart's desire, Ankhesenamun
Years waiting, wrapped, enshrouded destiny's son
If I'm awakened, the curse will truly be revealed
I am the only one, my cost paid in being forsaken
In the empty black realm of mental trauma, I seethe
As years of timeless moments stirred all my fears
If I never escape, the light world endures, awake
The purpose of an eternal existence will be failure
Millennia lost in violations of the religious laws
I must love enough to overcome final damnation
But the wounds of my suffering all still linger
I have been lost to the madness of my mind
About to be devoured by the greatest curse
To master existence, marked by time
Each wall marked with a spear, a polished skull at the tip
To tell every new enemy that there'd be no option of peace
Facing fears of a people who offered no quarter, many fled
Few didn't let fear inform any action, even beneath a whip
Leaders of a fortress unfallen in sieges, they knew caution
The enemies unconcerned with slaughter, one of the dead
Trust and will go together, defenders may stand forever
Every skull upon every spear tip was one from the city
For the cities own helped defend the fortress, in death
The life I could have lived before I cared, lost those chances
Asleep at the wheel my life was gone in those circumstances
I lost my hearing, lost my voice, nothing left in the madness
I no longer bleed my blood, I bleed ink in my nothing status
Nothing left but bleeding, not enough blood to easily die
No matter my convictions, no matter my fear
The day burns as night follows with abandon
Dreams to come, vivid, frightened by the day
Spirit of somnambulist voice, is a companion
Sleep will reject all desire to control the path
Waking sans memory and come Armageddon
All calls to prayer turn to screams and wrath
Fire reduces a world to flame and sacred ash
Breaking my bones on rocks, my flesh refuses a fight
As this bleeding streams down my eyes, pain insane
My life leaves me, bleeds me, the cost is never paid
Drive myself to the wrong future as all hope is gone
Never quit but I was slowed, freezing my last move
I turned from the inferno, moving to sacred ground
Even if it takes me longer, I know the direction
Cast into nothingness, without moments or notice
Our lives broken and still, we created an opus
Life lasts only so long, with each diagnosis
We smile knowing we've done all we can
Knowing that our future isn't about now
If a fearful prognosis, ignore the ending
I will love you unto becoming vapor
As I disappear into time unrelenting
The present and past are no match
For life lived well and attached
We'll meet again, love again
The children hold flowers, freshly
Smiling as they hold them gently
A fragrance reminds them of joy
One that the Elysian fields allow
A wholly innocent joy unequaled
But what do we experience in life
That steals pure, replacing as pain
Finding a hope in the end of the world
Allows one to welcome that slaughter
Sorrows and pain weaves the tapestry
Depicting our struggle to an ever after
Sticking around in despair, no amnesty
Sinful, ugly, dark hearted man, flawed
I can only escape by the grace of God
Not going to quit, but with all my sins
I will never be acquitted, I am guilty
Oh, the screaming never ends here even from bottom to the top
After a tornado is spotted, warning sirens blast to chills within
There's no beast greater than this one, black in pitch and sound
Its teeth are sharp and huge, jaws able to deliver a wicked bite
With wet fur, a foul odor, and it's a hideous denizen of a swamp
Chasing victims so long that those fleeing will fall in chagrin
This powerful tornado cannot be stopped and no hope's found
The sanitarium has no angels of mercy or staff to be the light
Wind shatters glass, it sprays death over the residents gathered
Thereafter a screaming begins to lessens in grave devastation
Families send us to die, not wanting updates, we don't matter
Who knows we might be dangerous, to each other, or them
Maybe we deserve to be destroyed by the hand of nature
Seeing that black mass, I understand, we're meant to die
Its the way we are meant to slaughtered, society's lost
No one needs us, we are the forgotten, the hated
I didn't get to say it when you were alive
I didn't understand it until I was a father
My last moments of you are interwoven
My son's first moments experiencing life
This, my beloved son was made possible
By your gifts and by your long sacrifice
The world is made possible with money
But I never made money nor understood
Why I was a failure to you until the end
At last you could forgive me, being me
I forgave you as not being like me too
My heart still misses you, time goes on
Finally I can smile, and know the truth
There will come a time, when all humans will surrender their role
Choosing to leave the planet, in the hands of Artificial Intelligence
If the earth is tamed, will there yet be tsunami? Or our domination?
Will the earthquakes still linger, or will tornadoes no longer twist?
Will there still be the locust swarms, swallows flying in formation
Great migrations of animals controlled, with gorillas in the mist?
Will humans be given numbers instead of names, will they survive?
How will AI choose the winners, does it choose who lives or dies?
Do we even care, or abandon earth, like all the high minded ideals
In dreams we once had, shall we be brought to heel, or cast out?
I'd come back, after losing every life's breath
Nothing to sustain me, I'd nothing, even hope
Lazarus had nothing on me, I was ready to go
You were my blanket, warm and comforting
Alive again, I was able to come back to flesh
You gave me my security, inspiration, dreams
Broken, but counting the every chance to be
In your love, lost but then you gave me hope,
Exhausted, but with your love, I've now rest
Your love saved me, you gave me higher love
You were my hope, my life had never had that
I stand renewed, forgiven and given enough
All because you said yes, all because of you
“To save all we must risk all.”
Friedrich von Schiller
The mirror is emptied, no ghostly reflection
If in a moment, it exists free without sound
I scream silently, invisible, under dissection
Aware now that I've violated sacred ground
By heartbeat, by existing, despite my flaws
The world will go on in one way or another
My flesh goes on ever trapped in forever fall
"To become presence, means accepting the risk
of absence.” 
Breaking only narrative, we persist
Dying to save the others, see them resist
What do we want, oh what do we hunger
For days pass, we're blinded and wonder
Do we get to ask the knowing in the end?
Or should we assume that we're nothing?
Every dream fulfilled but hallucinations
Is every life worth being made into myth
Hidden beneath shrouds, we are adrift
Until awakened, with a gentle kiss
Here we wait, standing until
We pass behind the mist
We never understood our species, a mire of our killing ways
The sun seemed to fall from our sky, setting the world afire
Destroying our human civilization, our species barely alive
Yet, desire no longer drives us, we need to survive within
We were condemned to live upon a burnt planet's remains
No longer free of spirit, we were in bondage to pain, tired
Released and blinded by all the rust in our injured mind
Our species once obese in excess, now bones and skin
Little to wonder upon, no more joy to drive our species
In full despair, a planet covered by bones and artifacts
The memory of wars, of decay, of loss is our sole task
Waiting for death, on this planet death still lingers
We cannot escape, forever we are prisoners
Waking from my forever sleep, my eyes opened in dreams
I hadn't lost you and never felt loss from my endless bleed
The sun was golden and glowed, the wheat was full, ready
As winds were soft, the memory of your kiss led me to joy
The fields were alive in hope, creation had calls I'd follow
I lingered in your presence, my love was no longer hollow
To be there upon the hillside, never becoming tired, I laid
As the time came, as I was renewed, my soul given solace
My being was born to see this place, a morning awakened
I was in the 9th Legio Hispana, crushed in a mire of Picts
Tried fleeing but slaughtered, on those fields of Caledonia
Few survived such as I, many missing from sound or sight
Days away from civilization left one with a profound loss
We knew we stood at the head of a flood, a great shame
Failure's bitter taste in mouths, please forget our names
Tides of battle turned against us, our empire has paid
As I think upon that day, I'm content in my passing
A death of intentions, a disaster, we could not sleep
For Elysium waits for me, and for my brothers, death
Our day is done, our spirit sings in a land of dream
Longing only to see our loved ones ... once again
In a reflection of the moon's attention, there is light
But the moon is alive in the night's sky, of darkness
While the moon sees human event from a distance
Stars offer light too but darkness stands with night
Staring upwards in fascination over all of existence
But even in the darkest night, the moon shines on
He died under a flag of truce, a peace event unfamiliar
After an entire life, spent in battle, leaning on strategy
A body failing, a mind tired, his will no longer willing
If the empire fell, it wouldn't be for the lack of his acts
Too old, in his mind, to raise a family, he was content
The world he experienced needed guidance, he gave it
If he didn't care about the future, he understood a past
He'd given all one could give and sought no reward
His life was spent rescuing a world, he had saved it
Renewal and restoration was for other generations
That dead flesh we eat, if we are masters of nature
Becomes the slippery slope into false gods and purity
Choosing a slaughter, contradicting the high morality
By eating only vegetables one makes another choice
Sometimes self righteous, calling for condemnation
Both sides find their morality, allowing a judgement
Of another's choice to choose differently than you
Whatever you personally hold to be truth
You left me speechless, dreamless, hopeless and stained
Love from you was worthless, selfish, burning in pain
There is nothing inside me, I'm left emptied
The wounds you left will never be healed again
I have nothing, I want nothing, just leave me, Please...
To the depths of space beckoned we were called to be more
With no forewarning, the last of the space vehicles left orbit
Those left on the surface without hope to escape the planet
Upon that planet, they'd been sent to discover all the ruins
Remnants of an alien life, artifacts of culture, and illusions
Finding people who had joy, purpose, love and fulfillment
Those left behind had wanted to record archives of the lost
There'd be time to figure it out, discover the deepest cause
There were reasons for loss, however many years distant
But there promised a world to know, to revel in and exalt
"an eternity it must have seemed to the others standing
by - I was struck dumb with
amazement, and when Lord Carnarvon, unable
to stand the suspense any longer,
inquired anxiously, 'Can you see
anything?' it was all I could do to get out the
words 'Yes, wonderful
things.”
―
Scientists found the bones of enormous beasts
They could blow out fire with their breath, and fly
Other than exciting stories and legends, no one cared
They'd grown up told how they were the greatest
Of archives of past told stories of honor and battle
Through which they told themselves constantly
That the ancient generations had lied or spun tales
And now as they learned, they hadn't lied at all
Some took the news with grace, but most did not
To lose one's assumptions of greatness is not easy
Did it really mean they weren't greatest generation
The present world is stainless, flavorless, so clean
The present is empty, plastic, steel, artifice, ugly
A world built to function, automated, their slave
Losing sight of importance, ritual and memory
Culture exchanged for their comfort, fed hubris
They didn't know they'd lost hope, stalling
For now they had lost the idea of legacies
For now the ancestors had slayed dragons
And had shown the way forward, by example
To this generation, one that hunts for pleasure
With no honor about it, killing to extinction
They would wipe themselves out, swiftly
They'd not know it, hubris caused blindness
Whoever read the archives of the present
Would surely see the ironies and jealousy
Unable to stop themselves from damnation
By arrogance and death by their own hand
While hubris is subtle, entropy is truly loud
They'd not know the difference between them
Seeing the bones wouldn't change a thing
And so now they wallow in the truth
Not to come up for air, ever
Exhausted and chased by predators
My flesh is what they want to steal
Many enemies, fewer allies to help
Their flesh a sort of our species, not
Looking blank imposters, inhuman
Entering into a unconscious shock
Our future species or in devolution
Will we feed upon our own young?
Are our dreams of a future done?
Are our species hopes finally gone?
How might we escape the future
We are children of a broken past
Will our generation be the last?
Your ghost remains the sole visitor here
And I wish it would stop, it hurts badly
Who am I to say who gets to haunt me?
Our tear stained goodbye and your loss
I'd nothing to say or do for my future
This place and time, dystopian world
Time after time, bitter tears have fallen
Curse and shame, from pain and blame
We'd not known that the time could end
But it did, in its place a sorrow instead
No one rightfully lives without a need to learn and without mistakes
I wasn't ready to learn how much I've lost due entirely to my hubris
Oh I'd acknowledged that I was terrible human, over a space of time
Found umbrage in any disagreement, my list of friends single digits
My own path filled with falls, thus I aimed upon how brave I'd been
Had I chosen to be grateful, my path wouldn't have been impossible
I'd required my life to be lived without accusations, with no debate
Not a life lived without accusations as is due to one lived perfectly
My life was lived with corrections due to flaws but indignantly
I was owned by pride and my acts to remind me was an "attack"
I've dissected my past, my ego or self esteem, found my lack
That the season for most of Western Civilization to celebrate renewal and hope, is, ironically, during the northern half of the planet's heart of winter. We begin from there and every day grows in the amount of sunlight during each day.
More and more, days get warmer, brighter, and transcends our human tendency towards entropy. How to keep hope alive is truly near, for we began in the midst of restorative rest, and are compelled towards warmth and light.
Be absorbed in glories of warmth to come, find your way to renew and begin again, in the cold of winter.
A beautiful moment, only Gods could not find awe
Upon humans wasted expression, too subtle for notice
This life that we are given, has potential for greatness
But we sleep upon the chance, and we inevitably fall
Perceive isolation as Hell, signal mixed, out of focus
Dreams of our own throne, beings of glory await us
In oblivion we are lost, still saved from torture's call
Our Lord is kind, seeking our love, atoms nameless
We are mistaken in fears we lost, we're offered love
We lose our path, fear of wrath, oh there's enough
“Much as oblivion is the death of sorrow
So death is life's forgetfulness"
Mihai Eminescu
