Back again with news...

I will be taking another hiatus. And I might bounce back once and a while, but this time, it is more serious than the previous time.

Many great things are happening, but health is not one of those great happening things.

Back when I am back. Bless you all.

Until I return

Two images from a book by Masahisa Fukase, a favorite, The Solitude of Ravens a photo book, illustrating the depression and sorrow of a photographer who was unhappily divorced, it crushed him, and he documented the beauty in the dark, with photos. He fell down a long spiraling outdoor concrete staircase, and broke his neck, and was in a vegetative state for many years, before finally passing. 

© Images the estate of Masahisa Fukase

My own first book was named A Life of Ravens but it was not homage, or intended to swipe, I saw ravens as our watchers, our guardians and keeper of our secret, so the trick of my title was, the life of a raven involves watching and knowing human lives, and therefore  A Life of Ravens is, the life of epic events in humanity, as seen from some one at a distant.

Thanks to all who were a part of the work, and God bless you all.

An homage to my Brother Mike

He is my brother, yet not from blood, but by steel
We'll fight back to back, Asgard's gate is besieged
I'd have no other, none being so willing or able
For Thor, Odin, Baldur, and Heimdall give battle
We shall fight well, as chosen by Odin's valkyrie
Calls goes up, walls come done, a disaster area
My brother breaks through the giants
And he fights with fire is in his blood
I get taken down, struck by axe
So many deaths comes in a flood
Yet I know we'll be alive again tomorrow
For in Valhalla, we train to live another day
The Aesir seek us for our ire, we will rise
Raise the raven banner again and again
We were forged as forever allies

To my eldest brother Mike Grell, my finest mentor
Thanks for your friendship and brotherhood

Until then...

A true Poet who suffered for more than her works

In That Place

To lay dreaming, in a far away place
To be sleeping, calmly, a perfect day
In realms of Heaven, hopes I chase
It is there Elysium calls my name
Solitude and silence, joy and peace

ANGELS

To dive into the reality of existence requires bravery
A risk of finding the truth that you're a coward stings
Because who wants to die, who wants that damage
If I'd not for the love of my wife or of having my son
The cost of life would be far too much to ever endure
Every angel in Heaven looks down as I fail, and sings
Are they mocking failure, or singing encouragement
They can be heard upon birth, joy or upon grieving
I'm in pain, existence has left me broken, exhausted
But I still believe

Rescued

I live, all because of your sacrifice
Others might see this as a false act
But reality doesn't wear a disguise
Surrendered to a crowd, then flailed
Taken to the cross, suffered and died
By your action and compassion
I am made alive
Despite every sin, by confession
I am made clean, and I repent
From every sin, and again

Grace

To be given a gift, without thought of return
Is an act called grace, one cannot measure it
Our world spins upon a material plane, turns
We are beings, dual citizens, flesh and spirit
Souls waiting to be awakened, the flesh alive
Some will rise to live in Elysium, others dust
Some will fly upon winds to Heaven, so trust
Existence comes of a creator who gives grace
We will gain freedom, the chains will break
Our flesh will be celebrated as a beginning
The core of our being is spiritual and forever

To Hunger

There I stared into the world, blinded by my hunger
Starving, bleeding, and fully abandoned by dreams
But I might hunger, my flesh unworthy of being fed
Desiring what I do not need, for a fight downstream
Look for more than I ought, to escape my locked box
Just a man, with nothing more than hope and mercy
Future is unknown, there is no promise, only hope
I live to know truth, even if it means I will not pass
My heart lives, my mind is alive, but I am drowning
Please share your grace and please throw me a rope
Or I might drown, starve from my own mistakes
You are all I need, you are all it would take
For me to survive the world, before I break

Isolated Solitude

Isolated, my heart is ever bleeding
Like a handful of benzodiazepines
You bring the whispers of the sleep
Calling me deep into a dreamscape
The world will be there as I wake
I will be ever seeking, ever needing
The touch of you, your presence
For alone, I'll end this nightmare

It doesn't happen overnight

In the days of antiquity, before we gathered so much knowledge
Concepts of morality and philosophy were used to teach a mind
But long before the world of now existed, humans were growing
Do we teach algebra to kindergarten, a mind isn't mature at birth
How long have we existed, able to think, to know, how much time?

The World Emptied of Hope

Policies of the government and behavior of the citizens
Didn't give the nation a fear of the unknown, or known
They'd a 10 year vacation now following the great war
No one expected life to get worse, after the 14-18 war
But devastation from war, plague, hatred, and racism
Exhaustion led to absence of care, adding more scars
Upon arrival, no one recognized what was going on
World balanced on greed, taking irresponsible risk
And the Depression, Dust Bowl changed all hope
Even the wealthy lost their empires, until the war
Measured revenge, pay for humiliation unresolved
War had allowed full employment, and slaughter
Somehow people were satisfied with the exchange

The Dust planet

The people didn't know, they weren't at all developed scientifically
Hunger drove this new hunt, after which the environment changed
The loss of predators and mega-fauna altered the biological patterns
Then the overwhelming population of small fauna, grew unlimited
On the surface of the planet bustled, contesting survival for all
For now it was a matter of time, as species fought for living space
Degradation of the biome, decay of the system of waste and floura
Population of intelligence life would starve beyond any recovery
Layers and layers of dust soon collected, with no possible survival
No escape for anyone, a blue marble planet turned brown, bone dry

Duel

The dragon's eye, stared below towards the villagers
It didn't lose focus on even one and he decided to act
From heavens high, diving down to the world surface
No number of human archers could yet pierce its hide
No magic or spells sent up by humans ever harmed it

Yet two knights stood, wrapped in dragon hide armor
Holding upon great swords, ready to fight and win
Hours of battle, wounds and damage, ended well
With the dragon angry and leaving for other lands
And left the two knights with a story to tell
Rather than victims, or corpses abandoned

Birth

I have lived longer than I have left
But I am willing and able to go
Never forgetting my purpose
Even as my body breaks
My flesh is gray, my mind has paled
My heart beats weakened,
Oh how I've aged
But I still believe the future is ready
For we have a duty, to deliver it alive
Not unlike a birth, future is survival
We need to be lead them by serving
By being kind and gentle every day
We've nothing in life but children
We must show them the way

To Save the Species, We must Dare

In a centrifuge of the Gods, molding and preparing
With the catastrophes awaiting, linger, as we dare
Above the atmosphere, now, free from gravity's pull
We reach into space, beyond all our ancient dreams
Discovering our destiny, the call of fate fading away
We're meant to ride an ocean of stars under full sail
To change our future, to save our species and planet
We must dare, we must risk, and we must succeed

Self Caused Catastrophe

I never knew the pain I caused, never
Because it was what I myself had felt
I felt entitled to my ignorance and was
But then my world crashed December
Being unaware was not a reason to be
And broken or bitter, didn't set me free
My flaws known but after they severed
My heart from the only one to love me
And in this place, in this pit I will stay
For it is upon my shoulders, the cause

D-DAY

D-Day was the moment when the West realized the end had begun
But not for the victims in the concentration camps starving to death
Nor the partisans in the Pripyat Marshes chasing SS Einsatzgruppen
Not even bomber crews performing daylight raids over the Reich
For each it'd be easy to still wonder if there was any hope to survive
Which isn't to say any of the invasion beaches were easy to conquer
The world should wonder how people endure such obscene actions
War is nothing but anger, violence, and revenge rather than words
Let it end

The Calling

To each of the new mothers and fathers
Love your children and raise them well
For the world is dangerous, even violent
Raise every child to be dragon slayers
For our world is dark, an enemy surrounds
Never let them steal the child's sweet joy
There are many who feed upon innocence
There are many who harvest human sorrow
Protect and guide every single child
For the wilderness is wild with hunger
Every child must be ready for battle
Let them fight for honor, for truth
For they will replace us in life
And apply the taught righteousness
Never to believe in heresy, nor lies of race
For innocence is born but hate is taught
Be slayers of the dragons, and find hope
Let us build the fortress, of love wrought
And protect those who cannot
And defend the truth from lies
To live with honor and love
Of which there is never enough

"Artist Eleanor Fortescue-Brickdale"

Simone and Shirley

What is life but to eat, sleep, act, and dream?
My dreams are of beloveds, the lost
Particularly, my mother, ingrained in my heart
Her last living days polluted by a dementia
Of beings to steal from, this theft
Stole my heart, and many more
I lost everything in losing her
I was crushed in my core
I dream of Simone, a beautiful lost soul
She was my beloved purely black cat
Her tender cry called from the ever mist
Never have I been loved by one so much
If dreams are not real, perhaps a portent
My life has seen love, but far more loss
Dreams restore, implore me to continue
For without loved ones to call my name
I would fall into a malaise, and shame
Thank God for each of these dreams
The dreams offer the only true hope
Until I am allowed join them
In fair Elysium
Dreams are a glimpse of joy
So come Elysium come
Reunite me with my loves

The Distant Place

Knowing the few years left, earth is made a tomb
I had a dream of the stars, forming a gate to beyond
But my vision was unclear, for the darkness of space
All things created, evolved, made for their purpose
Earth is our home, existence through her womb
The beauty and the macabre, the silent and the black
To reach that distant place, to lose the facade we bear
When humanity stands again, as eternity is embraced
We will plant our seed, humanity is not doomed

In his Labors

His life had never been his own
He gave it to his parents and wife
But he felt a bitterness inside him
There was nothing to learn or love
Only obedience, duty and the fear
That he'd be never anything more
Than a servant, staff to all others
Yet in serving is where one learns
Humility, hope, trust and honor
If duty exists, honor is grown
He did become a man of honor
Without even knowing the trait
In time, he learned to feel joy
In the love of others, by serving
One becomes master of his fate

A frozen world

In subzero cold, frozen flesh, nothing moves
Standing in a place, with no warm sanctuary
Earth has since changed, losing our safe orbit
Warming didn't bring four horsemen hooves
Ice age followed the comet, hope involuntary
With no means of escaping, no magic carpet
Humanity will freeze, none survive subzero
Never think you're able to control climate
Never believe the world remains the same
Climate has changed, it does what it does
Let us have the wisdom to respond to facts
But when that next change does happen
It isn't something we can ever avoid
It happens, knowing the result, act
Or it happens, we do nothing and die