A HOLY BANNER RAISED

A challenge has been offered, a quest accepted
My flesh to bear the cost, years of time as well
To ride across the land, in famine and drought
Searching for a holy vessel, a sacred receptacle
Brought to our island, by Joseph of Arimathea
King Arthur's soul suffers, calling for renewal
I will give my life should it be needed, for him
For he bears Excalibur, called to fulfill destiny
He is the timeless Pendragon, our truest King

I know now what the Grail is. It is the desire of the generations mingling like
water with the Blood of Christ, and caught in a fragment of Substance that is
beyond Matter! It is a little nucleus of Eternity, dropped somehow from the
outer spaces upon one particular spot!”            John Cowper Powys

The Test is not easily passed

The only way to be free from pain, might be death
Do I wish to die? Do I desire such divine abilities
Perhaps in pain we are meant to show our devotion
To the one who made us, a test to display our faith
We all will suffer, but for some it breaks them fully
For others it's a chance to show the depths of belief
A chance to tell the world, I know this is not forever
And upon death we'll enter a world without pain
And we'll have then passed a test, a universal quest
To show others there is more to live for than now

No More Winter

Heat above our ability to endure
Oceans grow from the melted ice
Days are too long, the sun burns
And our sorrow has no disguise
We never acted to save ourselves
When it was yet possible to do so
There is only fear, no hope is left
The waters rise, the deserts grow
And we still can't understand why
All our dreams and children die
But we wonder upon the reason
Our inaction was treason
No more winters, no more comfort
From the burning sun
No more hope, no more earth

Like Sheep

We'd listened to political liars debate
And we never questioned the motives
Of those who'd then have power, wealth
Like sheep to the slaughter was our fate
Our dreams of having gold so explosive
Each of the liars were bad for our health
Why let them rule or give them power
Or allow them access to war machines
Destroying a world in under an hour
We ignored instincts and the stories told
We are like sheep led to slaughter
We placed our future upon an altar
Sacrificing our new generations, for gold

"Thus the lights went out, and in that moment
civilization in Fort Repose retreated a hundred
years...          So ended The Day.” Pat Frank

The Hollow

A hungry child, lays still at the side of the road
The driver kept driving, it wasn't his job to care
A dying old man, can't catch his breath, screams
But the staff consider him a lost cause, no hope
A woman is raped repeatedly, her life is unfair
But the world blames her for the crime, a theme
We're all hollow inside, we have no compassion
The world taught nothing about living with grace
It is there, one must ask forgiveness, and believe
If they do or not, the chance to be clean remains
Instead most remain silent, nothing inside, hollow
With no place to go, we fend for ourselves alone

Our dreams replaced, by self imposed shadows

Seeds that do not take root, never bloom

I walked alone, for eternity, on a planet of lifeless sterility

Each step like the first, this isn't my planet, mine is Earth

The boredom and lack of life makes me realize so much

Humans were given a garden of Eden, pregnant with life 

We made it die, sending seekers out, to find new worlds

As this planet has no life, nor ways to support it, I'm alone

And I watch as the suns rise and set, my bio suit is alive

But I know this is no way to endure, waiting for someone

For anyone to find me, the signal beacon died, in the past

I walk, not for peace of mind, but to find a way to survive

Hoping beyond hope to find what years have failed to find

A reason for life to take root, from the seeds we brought

Sadly I've found nothing, no proof, no hope, and no life

In the Maze

In a maze of deception, obedient to many masters

My flesh is dying, turning gray, decaying by stress

With no reasonable cause nor is there a true answer

My world flashes before my eyes, so begins the test

I surrender all I am, placing trust in others yet again

The fear of dying passed long ago, into the darkness

I refuse to be the one, who remains without the one

My will overrides the wisdom gained by experience
I have nothing to lose, nothing still to ever gain
I trust the professionals, as my hold is precarious
My body breaking down, my mind is lost to pain
I trust in the one who called and spoke my name
Call me home or send me forward and I'll confess

ENDURE

This existence requires courage and persistence
For the sorrows of our every day are like cancer
We're given very little hope from the start of life
Consumed by a world's anger, but for a resistance
We're given a quiz of questions without answers
All called to make an impact in the face of strife
What is in our favor but our reason and our faith
I am flawed, with no special abilities, but grace
But armed with grace, let the quest begin

The Asylum is Full

We walk circles, whispering,  muttering
In the asylum, we encourage free speech
Speak your mind, however it is diseased
We never know what might be revealed
A world around us, is bleeding dreams
A life given, no one forgiven, I scream
I am without flesh, I'm made of shadow
As our civilization is becoming hollow
We've no future, only fields gone fallow
From fears of a future, we are shallow
The world goes on, with or without us
Things must get better to find justice

Why would they bother unless...

I was asked if I believe in aliens, in UFOs
It is clear to me that there is life out there
But does it visit Earth, a tiny blue planet
Its bizarre to think it would, who knows?
Why would it spend the energy, why care?
It'd require cost, labor, time, to just plan it
Unless they know something that we don't
Is Earth special, an oasis in a space desert
Has life here evolved with such great effort
As the surrounding space paid attention
Watching us move from savage fools
To become beings of higher thought
Of dreams created, and empires wrought

A Clay Vessel and Spark

Today I realized, that I have fallen more times, than to rise
I realized I've spent this life mourning, in a human disguise
My spirit in my clay flesh lingers, with the cries and echoes
But I've more to live for than I once had thought, I know
Today I resolve to be aware, a presence here is a privilege
Life is empty without love, I need to embrace forgiveness
Let me see my path before me, choosing the path of truth
Be alive to kindness and love, let me find my way to you

This Eternal Soul

I'm aware that the idea of eternity exists across the globe
Each with different forms, new angles, a myriad of hope
The truth though, we hope but we've no way of certainty
We linger in a practical, a limited world, the hard reality
Should we wonder, about a future, in a dangerous world
Are we trapped in the echoes and dust of our ancestors?
How can we ever hope with all our dreams unconfirmed?
I choose to believe, answering all of my fears with hope
There is nothing more I can do, I've no reason to distrust
This heart in me has a beat synchronized with the eternal
I have seen too much, I know there is more than this

“Life can only be understood backwards; but
it must be lived forwards.” Søren Kierkegaard

In the Madness, There is Purpose

Captured in a crowd, the cacophony of different sounds
Result of a great madness, anxiety, suffocation abounds
This place you are standing, is where you were planted
And the reason for being there, is the purpose madness?
No, it is a new opportunity to rise, a chance to be you
In the midst of grain, glorious hued gold, you are blue
The world is a puzzle to solve, not a grudge to resolve
Fight to know, consume every cultural food, and grow
You're worth the life you've been given, so rise and fly
Madness is not an illusion, but is a confusion
Presented with an image unknown, just try
And you see the wonders of living this life

Dark Reflection of Truth

A fool for most of my life, selfish and ungrateful

Still, a being in love, I'd found purpose and yet lost

I'd self esteem, but I had lived without true grace

I desired to have trust, hope without paying a cost

My dreams were to be all powerful and be adored

Instead, I found myself thinking that I'd mattered

Lusting for money and wanting attention, a whore

I'd within my reach, a perfect world and it shattered

Instead of love in my heart and soul, I found hubris

But there was nothing inside of my being to restore

And all I did for others was to rename myself Judas

Then staring into the eye of eternity, was hollowed

There's nothing in me but shadow and no dreams
I've cast aside hope for lust, and all fear for trust
A world goes on but my spirit and flesh turn dust
Emptied, bleeding out the future, in ruins

"Having fallen so far from so high a position, he
loved anything that had also fallen from a great height”

                                                                Gustave Flaubert 

The cause of my pain

I'm bleeding black
My ink is seething
My pen is broken
By fears unspoken
Yet I know I'm lost
There's nothing left
This soul is bereft
Know the final cost
I've no way to pay
So I'll simply wait
My being unwashed
Dirtied by my sin
The holy blood
Of the perfect lamb
Is upon my hands
The world is witness
To all my shame
I'm the one to blame
Caused all my pain

Beauty

Please define beauty for me, I think it isn't easily defined
Does it mean that your outside is pleasing to the eye
Does it mean your heart is pure and ever so kind
Or does it mean something esoteric or unique
Where the beauty comes from a source
That no one, no other possess or reach
Is beauty an ideal, boundaries and lines
I ask because I well know someone
Who is beauty in all ways defined
I would never wish to lose her
Stirring in my heart, soul and mind
I love her, she is all my heart can dream
I deserve so much less than her love
I feel as if I've gotten away with a crime
Her red hair, porcelain skin, pleasing form
But she is mostly filled with love and intellect
I won't apologize for being overwhelmed by feelings
In solitude my heart called out to her as hers called to mine
Here I stand, no longer in despair, for she called out my name
As deep calls unto deep, there I met my life partner and my wife

Some might want to see a pic of her to see what I think is beauty.  But I
can say, without a moment of worry over the responses, as I fell in love
with my wife's heart for the lost, and the broken. I was one of them.

Her heart is beautiful.

Voici mon secret. Il est très simple: on ne voit bien
qu'avec le cœur. L'essentiel est invisible pour les yeux.

Antoine de Saint Exupéry

When Time Wins

A web of lies, a masquerade with masks
Life has deep chasms between the divide
Between longing for hope and happiness
And screaming fear and self hating inside
When just to breathe becomes the task
Losing all moments to a keeper of time
Life seems to drone along, we fail the test
We're not allowed to choose our path
Without sacrifice and efforts
Without fortune
And great hope

Why?

If the world turns upon an axis, without an end
Will the life I live be remembered, or perceived
The bleeding pain, from the torment of my life
Do we endure for the pleasure of other people?
Why do we live at all, beyond the primal urge
What is there? Why pursue this life that ends?
Unless within our being is a spiritual hole
One that seeks to be filled by a kind of news
A distant, ever present message sent
From the past from our species' memory
That will fill us, until we are whole
To a fullness everlasting

Difference Doesn't Matter

We saw the other as weak, for they had feelings
We called the other as fools, they weren't like us
We wondered why they cared, what we thought
Because the world steals all the wise teachings
Because that world says we'll never find justice
And if they think that way, they never will
For they began by being selfish and cruel
And they had arrogantly then believed
This was a world that they'd wrought
All this time they had wrongly perceived
For this world functions upon a set of rules
One where we see each other, as having worth
Our different skin colors are a gift, not a curse
And we are made stronger by knowing the truth
We may be different, yes we may have problems
Our hearts are the same and our minds all think
It is time to love one another, for who they are
Accept and love, our destinies are now linked
One people, one race, one species was made
Let us forgive one another, heal all our scars

The Mother Paid

In the cold of winter, a newborn shivers just born
I'm unable to cry, the tears are frozen in my eyes
I long to live and escape this world, but I cannot
When I was alive, all I was able to feel was scorn
I'm unwilling to suffer more, and wear a disguise
Staring into a black night, my words reveal naught
But I gave you my body, gave you a chance for life
Now as I am fading, I pray, you seize the moment
And learn to love, learn to forgive, and then live

This War Will End, Righteousness will Prevail

They were made of the same flesh, brothers and sisters
They took different paths to whom they'd then become
One took their name from the people who'd come and be
The others took their name from the word for borderland
The Rus and Borderlanders are all sisters and brothers
But they are not the same, and each have different futures
Слава героям України Glory to the heroes of Ukraine
As they've stood against the tyranny of their northern kin
Слава героям України  Glory to those who fight evil
Lift the great flag, of a great sky and golden wheat fields
Слава героям України, it will end, but war seems endless
And Ukraine will stand triumphant, and Russia will fall
For the bitter struggle has shown who is righteous

A NEW DAWN

A time to remember, a childhood of grace and potential
Freedom of the mind, alive to opportunities, and dream
A child of the future in a world so unprepared for hope
The horizon is golden, a new dawn becomes new Eden
Alive in the moment, truth reveals itself, we're not alone
We all seek the hope that a newborn has inside the heart
And we can only hope as adults, that we will be restored
A future made better, our heart healed, no longer scarred

The Right to Age

 They tell us not to cry, the pain is only temporary
 Without pain, we have no reward, so they will say
 But they are fools, we are their coal mine's canary
 They are hunters, we should refuse to be their prey
 Our world is a machine, that functions on a theory
 For one to gain, another must be chased and slain
 I refuse, kill me now, I will not be made complicit
 For a machine killing the innocent, our throats slit
 Refuse all of their entreaties and never surrender
 You have a right to die in your own time and date
 You've a right to keep your dignity and remember
 Every soul is equal, worth doesn't come from gold
 You've a right no matter the cost to truly grow old

The Memories have been lost

My memories are lost, in a mire of clay and firmament
My flesh decaying, dying, from lack of hope and grace
Why should I wonder about the cause, the end of it all
Love is a lost and fragile thing and nostalgic sentiment
When this life has ended, if fate and destiny embrace
Because I am not perfect, no, I am composed of flaw
I've so little to hope for by now, the end is permanent
Where can I go, what can I do, but wait for the end

Love in the Ruins

The earth cries, as tears fall from above
A destroyed paradise, destroyed home
We lived for lust, pleasure, rejected love
As I long to have a life lived unalone
Dust has settled, we lose our beloveds
I longed to know you, a love my own
You called me, and I heard you, still
My flesh responded, but couldn't act
Calling my name, as my pride spilled
To love again, might be a fool's task
But to be with you, might make me
Finally in the ruins, I'll be fulfilled
I'll call your name, and be redeemed

This miserable flesh

I should've been draped in a shroud
60 years of damage, created by a rape
Torn flesh from bone, ripped from reality
My being screams, unable to even dream
Sleepwalk through life, despite being alive
Nothing left inside, I'm living in the hive
And my fears have no reason, no direction
For as I fall, another will replace me
A human form of natural selection?
With no hope to return, but why would I
This existence is filled with pain and strife