We spent our life rowing our dragon ship, fighting an enemy
The world was bigger than our imagination, and time together
We didn't have a plan, or map, or guideline, an empty destiny
But the world was far older than we knew, perhaps forever old
As stars above the ocean shine, the moon gives light upon a way
Rowers count and rhyme in sequence, know that good is waiting
Whatever shores we aspire to reach, whatever hoard we'll take
Every day offers more than toil, as long as the pilot navigates
Our mother is the earth, our father is our guide, together
Face what we must, fighting back to back, hand to hand
This world is our home, wherever we will land
Dedicated BWN1961-12312022
The elder scribe gathered around him
Began to tell the listeners how to live
We know goodness as we know evil
A thought primitive and eternal calls
Inside we make sacrifices and hold
The selfish never met a time to share
As those who have abundance inside
What is too much to the mind of one
Is far too little and without substance
Another who has learned to survive
Find reason to endure, others do not
Some never need to find the reasons
Some never live without challenges
Making the best of lives is enough
Helping others survive is truly love
Find your end goals, gather your kin
The night cannot hide my fear, found in a sleeping heart
Found inside my mind, the tears there are bound in scars
Bleeding while I know the voice of pain, inside I'm dark
Betrayed by a mind, I was stabbed by an anger and pain
Flesh cannot continue to be healthy, rotting, I'm insane
An outer visage equals my inner rot, I scream in pain
My life reached an end, I wait now to die, for release
I have nothing inside me, I will never have peace
With retreat into days of crisis, peace isn't near
As we ignore all hope, doves turn to albatross
We get closer to the edge, from reasonable error
Death smothers hope, innocence is stolen, unfair
Button pushed, we swiftly pass the line to cross
Never trust the ruling old men to decide in favor
When you refuse this ongoing military crusade
For lives and half lives, so much more, are lost
The future dies and we've no innocence to save
By an excess pride and ignorance, we shall fail
Thereafter lighting the pyres for our species
Creature in darkness, is living in the heart of all of us
Humans are violent, always longing satiate a hunger
Some fight the urge, others give in to the dark voices
Some are offended by this idea we're violent, we are
In mind and heart we will speak to our natural state
We live in the moments when we are not in violence
We bear memories, remembering our acts, their scars
What we are going to choose is thus far unknown
Should we choose wrong is not proof of anything
All we can ever know is that we will fail others
Even with those people we love, all will be hurt
But we're not unique or different in our failures
There is a call to all of us, violence smothers
It seems a solitary urge, but we're not alone
And in our days, we all will track our prey
Standing over a conquered foe, an armored leg upon the throat
He didn't fight as a profession, he'd no choice, having been sold
In the time he was forced to be this warrior, fighting to survive
In time the fallen is fully unconscious, the dying foe is cold
Blood from wounds pool around the body, breathing is stopped
To live another day, one of the two must be chosen to rise or fall
As ultimately the crowd cheers, however bestial, a warrior dies
The survivor moves forward, the dying takes no more breath
By a knife just once
Many more by pills
Twice by tightened noose
I tried so hard to give up
But I was a failure in life
I was a failure in death
I kept lingering
With no hope at all
I never had it again
Hopes I once had, hurt now
As hunger dogs planned to sup
Bleeding into their cup
I was unable to think how
Bleeding ink wasn't new
I begged God made vows
Make me take my bitter cup
Let me pass from view
But now I kept existing
Lingering in the ghost veil
My being was emptied
My flesh a facade
Once physical
Now just dust
No memories
But hope lost
26 times never happened
25 was enough to learn
Life is a gift
One you cannot earn
Not by my own hand, I know shameful
I'd nonetheless prefer to be with her
With her I knew, darkest thoughts are dust
Without her, my life isn't worth the rust
Her scent, her voice, her mind, still linger
All are forbidden from my presence
Her gentle touch, her affectionate kiss
She was my only love, only soul mate
And now and ever I am in an abyss
Sorrow has a clasp upon my heart
It rarely beats, now so full of scars
But it will once again
Upon her return
When you asked me to feel
Know that I am never not
My dreams are dark, surreal
Oh I know, I am no god
In this bizarre, bleak reveal
My dreams betray my life
Showing the way I'm wrought
Bleeding the tears I've fought
Your lips spoke to my desire
You caused me to be inspired
Breathing fire into my being
You're the dream I believe
As days grow meaningless
As the nights pass swiftly
The empty markers of time
Can't be given meaning
Not by others nor by me
A layer of ash lays on the surface of the planet
Fires had burned upon meteor strikes, volcanic blasts
Still needed to walk from shelter in the darkness caves
The corpses all scavenged by smaller carrion eaters
But we needed a consistent source of food, water
The black sunless days left no sun to feed the plants
Millions of books and data were saved from disaster
But what good are they, if we can't survive long
All our food is dying, and the plants cannot grow
In the emptiness, the abscess of eternity
Nothingness reigns, asylum for insanity
Die with urgency or live remorselessly
The globe spinning, entropy winning
As lives of wonder yet pass asunder
The end of all happened long ago
Time releases all of her legacies
We can't see time as it thunders
All that remains are memories
Their Mother gave them life, she fed them, led them
Liberated them all and what did they all have to say
Leave me be, go away, I want nothing to even remain
Restless child hearts and freedom meant more than pain
Instead of being brothers we were, we'll have no mother
And in the final end, what does it matter, dying for flags
We don't have any hope, we never did, but still endured
Why were we ever able the thought, what did we have
As tanks and SS units, slaughtered Jews and Partisans
But in the end, mother defeated them, we just existed
Staring over borders of wheat, buried dead, who are we
We were brothers, born from the same mother, and now
Killing others with a same venom of one slaying evil
Flags are meaningless but apparently, brothers are too
If failing to find peace, all is lost with no retrieval
Why give damn anti-depressants to a suicidal man, why do you need to blame? Why give drugs that lengthen life when it means I'll face more pain? How much suffering is enough and who do I need to please? What fears do the rest of you have and being unwilling to let me leave? Why do the people in my life make such demands? What if life isn't the same for you as it is me? I never cared to pass tests for permission, just to let me go. Why can't you understand? I've been paying my costs, long before bills came due, trust that I still love you. I'm just tired, exhausted from tolls, telling lies that I've control. Take my flesh, take my remnant personal affects, mark them as artifacts of a lost communication, now gone silent... The crows will dance, in joy of a feast, as they hop upon the site of my remains.
“Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think.” Jean de La Bruyere
It is a fool thinking he can fight battles by himself
No quest is ended in success with the single actor
I've long ridden on back of my iron forged beast
Already even with victory in view, I've company
Those who've woven stitches sealing my wounds
As my sword maker and forge masters armed me
I am not alone in claiming victory, or my destiny
If I am unfinished or choose, at last, to go home
My steps were known, my life was made ready
By the words, actions, crafts found in all others
I have only done this with a crowd behind me
And words written upon my heart by a mother
I am not alone, and I have never been
Would that I gave you keys, fuel gauge full
And I let you take this broken down vehicle
Wherever you might think that I need to go
Here is my being's lack of forward progress
How do I choose to fail, how should I know
Emptiness lingers where my heart should be
I've nothing worth having, knowingly guilty
This world in chaos, my world will not exist
If I had closed my heart, blinded my mind
Even my world would have denied resistance
I'd be forced to choose my being, persistence
I become a failure with every step forward
Echoing an emptiness, an abject toxic fate
In answer so I continue building, labeling
The outside world may have its own goals
Then I remain alive despite a dying mind
I'm persistence, I'm the weed that grows
Despite opposition, despite lacking time
As ashes of the fire we burned lifts in the wind
The world around us turns, and our hearts hurt within
I loved you beyond all limits, until the finish
I hear your voice echoing in all background noise
Most find life is too long and love's not enough
But in your arms, I was in Heaven and charms
Where there is only peace and so much love
If I ever had dreams, They would be
Scenes of a life I never lived, truly
There is only pain, the cold sleep
I have no regrets, my heart is empty
Flesh is nothing, my spirit neither
A mind constantly replays seizures
I'm nothing, I want more but never
The world demands of me the truth
Only words and thoughts, no proof
The pain demands focus, I've none
It is time to end, I've lost the tether
Holding upon to the link, I'm tossed
Trying to survive, but I'll linger here
With no guidance and dead forever
I surrender, my life is at an end. I cannot remember the message sent.
Our past is dead, as a future portents, I cannot help wonder upon reasons.
This world is not a source of divine light. It now offers nothing but a treason.
This heart returns to black as a day turns night. I am alive, passing seasons.
Life is better than it appears, but I also need to move along. Gone.
Je
Suis
Fini
Floating through the ethers, a fog's veil
A living corpse calls his master's name
The rain is freezing, the air's bitter
Though early Autumn, feels like winter
Watching ghosts of lives flourish
In the white thick clouds they live
Memories of lives once given
And seeking love
At last to be forgiven
All proof is lost in the evidence files
Facts exist but they confuse issues
Nothing is equal, not even thought
In the absence of knowing, I plead
As ink flows, into misery wrought
The truth is worth knowing, dream
Sleep escapes me, nightmare bleed
The ink in my veins pours from me
A vein is cut, all my arteries burst
Knowing isn't the same as a proof
Paint the walls, paint the corridors
My ink sprays across the room
I am well prepared for the end
The cold ground is my tomb
He is in my favorite poets list, but the sole unhappy aspect of reading him, is that this seemingly modern minded and individualistic poet wrote so long ago, most of his work is lost to time. The three books shown above engage in his work and probe the historical person he was. But there was surely much more, and is now beyond our reach.
From the raining fire, their god Vesuvius cried
Smoke roared and flames screamed from a gaping maw
Fleeing for safety, many found nowhere to run
Sound of an angry God fiercely casting stones
The dead lay where they fell, in unholy ash
For this God's anger had only just begun
Humanity need learn to obey the lash
Punished for dreaming of the different dreams
The time for thought was gone, earth and gods are one
The people lived for pleasure, lived for themselves
Rather than sacrifice for the gods or in fear
SOURCE
I was cast into the ground, once open, foul and wet
A place no longer needed, my soul no longer met
You are the cause of my despair, and I have no hope
For I've life, but no longer of legacy, I stand
This violence you desire, the stain is not by my hand
When I called your name, nothing echoed in sound
No songs, no words, no fresco of beauty or thought
My voice has been stolen, no hope I'm earthbound
Days fade, dreams never begin, my end is wrought
For without love and without my voice, I'm silent
And in the quiet I can only hear myself cry
Tied and laced behind, the suit covers every bit
Darkness lingers rather than shines, as if lasers
Shine and gloss, reflective and solid, just admit
You are thrilled to be the one, receiving favors
With gag and tightened collar, he can't escape
Your hand works a crop, retrieving obedience
Every moment of darkness reveals layers
With you the trust is always in doubt
But I think you like that, even a lot
You left my life the way you came, whispers in the wind
Heart healed by a presence, soul broken, alone again
You called my soul from somnolence, and rest within
Gone from me, knowing the beyond, a message sent
I'll search the after all place, to find your voice and love
My broken body, my broken soul, still longs for you
Your presence, time by my side, is, for me, enough
