The words of a prophet

Then there a man came
He was thought to be a prophet
Without any name
He was remembered for only words
He asked
How much is a life worth
Does suffering add or debit
Do we know our way
Is life a blessing or curse
Words are weapons
Life is a maze without exit
And love has become shame
Are we a blessing to this earth
Or is love a relic, and we are the menace
Our world will pass before our eyes
Wrath and torment, beckons
As this and every civilization
Painfully dies in flame
And with everything that lives
There will be endless suffering
So now and forever after
Abject, total, absolute and fetid decay

lies

If the sun refused to rise
You'd still have to hide your eyes
You lie so often I am shocked by truth
Never for the right, never for the good
So tell me why I should believe
When lies are all I ever receive
From you

The Cost of Telling the Truth

Ovid of Rome was a man who spoke the truth
But he was aware that anything he said
Might well mean he was censored
He might offend a ruler, or the masses
By words
Truth was a fire inside, it burned
And when he was exiled for words
A concept of thought, so absurd
He knew
He was sent far away
To contemplate his errors
And was never allowed to return


"'Conscia mens recti famae mendacia risit'
'The mind, conscious of rectitude, laughed to scorn the falsehood of report.'
Ovid

The tapestry

Love is a tapestry
Woven in perfect stitch
It persists forever
Threads of golden silk
Sewn upon your heart
Written in perfect ink
Love leaves attachments
And yes
Love makes you bleed
Love can be a catastrophe
If all you want is to leave
But love fulfills
It does not hollow you
Love endures
Love soaks the whole way through
Every piece of artifice
Every moment you lied
Every fear you let live
Until the point you collide
With knowing the truth
You have no choice
It is between living and dying
Inside

Scimitar bearers

Our blades are sharp
They are like the crescent stars
We call them scimitars and they are curved
They serve us, as we serve our lord
The foe calls dogs or worse, pigs of war
But we are aware of our true identity
We are neither saints, nor sinners
Servants of the blade
Of our Master
In this service we might die
While the survivors bear the scars
They also bear the memories of lineage,
Duty and honor is our legacy
Upon the ramparts there
We extinguish the fires
Set by rebels and barbarians
Defend the fortress against harm
We serve our purpose
Created an empire
Offering up our bone
Our blood
Muscles, life and arms
Keeping our citizens civilized
While standing against the rising tide
Of those who seek to destroy, rape, or pillage
No we cannot tame them, they'll always be wild
But someone must defend against the approach
Like a dam holds back the waters rising in the flood

We are not thankful

We believe in the perfection of the species

We wonder why our actions do not succeed

We are grateful for our comforts and leisure

Our world is impermanent and so are we

We will kill one another, for the revelry 

We will slaughter a brother in abject greed

We will murder one another for treasure

Or for our visceral pleasures 

We will do as we will seek 

Whatever we might find

And by our hand's unholy act

 “…So when the last and dreadful hour
This crumbling pageant shall devour,
The trumpet shall be heard on high,
The dead shall live, the living die,
And Music shall untune the sky”
― John Dryden

Remnant Life

Our flesh has faded
The meat removed from the bone
The blood has flowed
From a body broken and jaded
When we are gone
No one will remember
But our flesh dismembered
And our dreams made to feel
Foolish
And deflated
A box of bones all that remains
We should have known better
But the decay is persistent
There is no resistance

Protect the Egg, Save the Species

The ancient one protects the young
Her vigilance allows the race to prosper
Shield the egg or invite oblivion
Stand against the egg thieves
Eternity beckons the ancient
As life beckons the young

Protegit pullos antiquo
Ea vigilantia esse concedit stadio prosperatur;
Oblivionem vocat ovum aut scuto
Stare adversus fures ovo
Fatisque vocantia antiquis aeternum 
Ut puer vita vocet

“How should we be able to forget those ancient myths that are at the beginning of all peoples, the myths about dragons that at the last moment turn into princesses; perhaps all the dragons of our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us once beautiful and brave. Perhaps everything terrible is in its deepest being something helpless that wants help from us."  Rainer Maria Rilke

If I were you

If I were you I'd wonder why
Each time I said I love you
It made you want to cry
If I were you, I'd ask again
Every time I was heart broken
Why you had acted as if I 'd sinned
You treated me with a special sort of malice
You refused to ask forgiveness
You've shattered our love's chalice
So I wonder why
I'd wonder why if I were you
That there is nothing left
So much sorrow
That you need to know the truth

no pretense

Yes I know
I said I want you but
what I meant was
something very
very
different
you see I was so afraid
but I felt a sync of spirits colliding
knowing what life was saying
yet
wanting so desperately to know
how to spend a moment
without regret
how to live without pretense
ever an ending
without resentment
I love you
I want you
and that
just makes it worse
so much worse
than the present
resolution to abandon
hope, or honor
just be together
without forever
beckoning in the distance

You

I remember when I loved you in a way that would seem in retrospect
To be something that is deeply introspective, imperfect, but kind
While I could never see how, I know it burned inside with a perfect light
It was aimed at you in a power and fire, that never died
Never has it faded, even through the years
Not even through all of our tears
Truth endures and goes on that we need each other,
And most deeply, we love what is inside
This love will go on, and on, forever unto the farthest mile
Forever and fantasy restored
This love dragged me from the depths, so Stygian
Upon a trajectory heavenward rather
And it might never have been sealed, memorialized
But for spoken words before friends
And family
And God

Venus

She taught all she knew, to live every moment
To enjoy life, to love others, to live without regret
She was amazing, an unique sort of beauty
Her skin was so soft, so pure, so perfect
Her hair was lush, it moved exquisitely
Her voice was a tapestry of magic
Memorable, unforgettable, immutably striking
All who knew her desired her
Or desired to be like her
But none ever would
Or could

Differently

They tell us to believe them
When they've lied every time
Each time previous to this
They'd like for us to panic
When they've tried and tried
To tell us we are full of shit
We know something different
But not if you listen to them
Think for yourselves
The liars will lie
Will say anything
And never ever repent

Has it ever mattered?

Does it matter where we are going
Has it ever?
Does it matter what we do
All I ever wanted
Was to tame this heart so wild
Was to find what is true
Now I find that I will never
Find the truth
Or anything even worthwhile
We are left behind trying to know
What we never will
It doesn't matter if you try
There is nothing to learn
You begin and then you go
You desire and yearn
You get old and tired

Memories

I walked upon the shores of the distant lands, the clouds were thick, and the ocean washed across my feet.  Toes digging into the sands, I remembered when the baby kicked, we thought the future was secure, so sweet.

I miss you since the day, and miss you all the time.  We were young and didn't care.  But now I am old, and quite resigned, to the fact I'll never see you again.  Sometimes I think life isn't fair, but I know, your spirit remains.

I will never be who I thought I was meant to be.
Because without you here, there is nothing.
And there will never be.
Again.

Red Skies, Black Crosses

Above the frozen ground below
Pilot breath, as if airborne frost
The eagles above fight for life
Bleeding and dying for the land
Awarded for the valor to show
Medals of a red star or iron cross
A political struggle, a racial strife
The blood is equally upon their hands
From the finest each warrior chosen
Talented men chosen for war
Making each contest a tragedy
For to win, one other must die
No hope to survive, the air is frozen
The event of battle leaving scars
Dogfighting and dodging, agilely
Heroes and villains filled the sky

We are the present

Echoes and cries of past generations
Linger and swell about the present
What are we to do?
Try to fulfill their expectations
Which we'll surely resent
Or follow what is true
Alive to our destiny
Ignoring the lure of fate
We will embrace our future
By rising above
Choosing our own names

A Sea Dragon Flies

A Sea Dragon flies above the ocean surface
With stingers in her tale, and cannons that fire
As with leviathans of the sky, she is heavy, slow
Her size makes her awesome, even ponderous
Her weapons in anger turn buildings into pyres
Leaving the foe with fear, pain, nothing to show
And yet this dragon is not wise
She is silent of thought
Cannot speak
She bends her will to man
She is made of steel
And carbon

I knew

Yes I know
Perhaps you meant well
maybe there was love
there within your heart
softly nestled there for me
but I think I was right
and it was better to split apart
I prefer to be hurt in your absence
than acid burn in your presence
I don't know
I can't read your mind
but our love was going to die
I just knew
I knew

make you smile

I wanted only what would make you smile
But that required a great deal of sacrifice
And an impish demon's guile
I thought I wanted a life together with you
But my heart wanted proof of life
And more to make it smooth
What is there? Why bother?
If it is all meant to take you down
Who cares as the pain smothers
And there is no holy ground
Nothing matters, it never did
Except for the heart burning within
It burns to embers
So I offer only this
I have nothing
But fire
And ash
But if that can make you smile
Let's do it

“...And, all at once, the moon arouse through the thin ghastly mist, And was crimson in color... And they lynx which dwelleth forever in the tomb, came out therefrom. And lay down at the feet of the demon. And looked at him steadily in the face.”  Edgar Allan Poe

Pendragon's Son

Even though he lived human
His spirit was holy and had been chosen
The blood pulsing through him
Guided his words, and pathway
His father was a king
A butcher of men
Warrior elite
A rapist
His flesh intertwined
With an unwilling, unknowing soul
The treachery left a legacy
A child born in the castle
Protected by tall walls
And knights and valor
But the product of the night
Of the treacherous lust
Desire made this man gone wild
Yet it bore fruit from seed, a child
Who would become the anointed king
He was taken swiftly by the seer
Who had arranged the night
Merlyn was not evil
And he needed to protect the babe
In the time when the land would be barren
Without a king
And young Arthur was trained
He was taught
He was inspired to be something more
Than a foundling
A bastard son
He was prepared to be the only one
Who might bear a sword
Kept from mortals by the Lady of the Lake
Who might build a kingdom
Defending a people
His way prepared
As a savior to come
The king was ready
To announce his presence
And that kingdom would be won
As the bearer of power
A just king and man
He bore the blood
Of the Pendragon's son
Guided by Merlyn
By his holy spirit
And his blood
He would be king
Of which
The Maidens of Avalon
And choirs of children
Would sing

Folly and Blame

We are fools, and evidence of our folly
Is found in the attempts to word an answer
But absolute truth requires no explaining
Every vision has a responsive calling
We lie to ourselves, hoping to avoid blame
But there is no escape there is only shame

Seconds passing and still

I watched as they took my brothers
Then they came for me
I bore the wounds of an anger
That tore apart seams sewn in love
Whatever the depths I'd seen
I knew it went much deeper
Never will I reach the good shore
and not because
Everything is foreseen
I know that the foe is eager
And when I reach out,
He closes the door
I fail with every breath
I am broken and so I invite death
There is nothing I can do
But I am ready
Faced with the final endless truth

Beth

My love for you was never kept inside
Never hidden, never a secret
I could never get enough of you,
I had no regrets
I was burning inside with passion
But I was broken and you were not
I lived with a sort of pretense
That I was alright
A man of action
Longing to turn the noose into a knot
To hang on long enough
To survive this place
Your love helped me surive
Long enough
To love
You allowed me to live
And find a way to forgive
All those I needed to forgive
Including me
My love a secret I could never keep
Now looking back
You were the only one
How much a miracle you are
For me
You gave me everything I lacked
I'd never go back to that place
So dark and unpleasant
How very lucky I've become

to them

To them its a purely simple thrill
Running with little steps down the hill
Screaming in joy the whole way
While you worry
Over a non existent fear of hurt
They find friends, begin to fight and play
As you watch hoping they find their path
Rather than to find your found truth
That this life is painful
With moments of splendor
But much more wrath
How to guide them
How to love them
Without taking their steps
Without taking the pain
Without sharing your shame
Letting them instead
Unlike you
Exalt all the good things
And unlike you
Find the life that is there

Not an apology

Please note: even if I don't remember
It doesn't mean it'll erase the stain
A million holy people giving prayers
Couldn't help nor absolve my guilt
I linger in the echoes of my madness
I know that dreams don't wait forever
There's nothing that can stop the pain
Existence gave me this empty stare
Because hope cannot be rebuilt
Black is my life, upon a black canvas
There is nothing left but breaking
This is not an apology
It is my statement of being

“A sick thought can devour the body's 
flesh more than fever or consumption.” 

Guy de Maupassant

Clash of Iron Dragons

No surrender, no quarter given
They bore a fire inside, compelling them
With a specific mission
These Iron forged dragons breathed fire
They forever moved forward
Never relenting
Fighting each other unto death
Memories of their actions show as scars
Carrying warriors to the field of battle
Fragile compared to the beasts
Made of flesh
But somehow still, of iron

fate

Alone in the darkness
I am consigned to fate
The devil is among us
He works to harvest hate











“La plus belle des ruses du diable est de vous persuader qu'il n'existe pas." ("The devil's finest trick is to persuade you that he does not exist.")”   Charles Baudelaire

Cruelty

Such divine cruelty
We've never experienced
As first love once severed
How dignity becomes slain
Choosing for beauty
When the inside is hideous
Justice misdelivered
An ever burning soul pain

Duel in Winter

Exhausted, frozen through, waiting to retreat, in the face of Ivan and his endless inbred cousins.  We held the line, with Moscow in sight.  We held the line, in the city named for Stalin.  We were bled white.  Our numbers fell.  We wait now, to get out, or remain in this white Hell.

Our crusade is over.  We cannot win.  Keep underestimating the foe, now we have nothing to show, but bodies pale from cold, wafer thin. We haven't slept for a year, haven't felt warm in Autumn, Winter or even Spring.  We fought for our cause, and now we are left with nothing.

We wait for the order.  But it may never come.  All that we have achieved, will be consigned to oblivion.