Read a poetry book by E. Pound
Smoked two packs of cigarettes
Drank a pot of coffee with cream
Early May 1988 Le Paris Métro
Waiting for her in the noisy station
Coffee to stay awake
While sitting slumped in a chair
A nearly empty cafe
I knew she’d never come but
Still I waited until the gates were closed
And the cleaning staff with brooms
Pushed me out
No matter that I’d waited
No matter that I’d been the one
She said that she loved me
But it wasn’t true
I spent a lifetime waiting
I spent a lifetime praying
For her to be mine
I did everything I was asked
Jumped through every hoop
Short of suicide
Gave her every ounce
Still she didn’t love me
I was so tired
If I’d said I loved her
It wouldn’t matter in the end
All there was, was heartache
From dreams I could no longer have
Not allowed
Any more
Never again
Because I loved her
And she was too proud
To ever love another
So
What was the point of trying
You end up tossed aside
Laying upon the floor
Dying from lack of love
Crying from lack of love
The end was begun
For without her
Loving me
I was done
