Painted, Tattooed, Victorious

(The Victorious Pict copyright and art by F. Lennox Campello )

Wild men
Tribe men
Dancing around the fires
Good men
Good lives
Fighting to survive
Following their instincts
Always trying to thrive
Flesh met steel
The Picts were brought to heel
Their ways flickered out
But our memories
Linger on

Fenced

There is a fence strung around my heart
It tears my flesh when I pray
My spirit reaches out
But pulls back in dismay
Shredded tendons and skin
Blood pouring from the punctures
The fence shakes from the impact
My body wracked from the sins
The journey is now reaching terminus
The foundation weak in structure
The fence is my own making
I've ignored the instructions
To be
Now I am forsaking all
To hold my self in
Without breaking

Lost

So empty and lost
Bleeding black inside
I am lost
All wrong
I can't feel anything
I am hollow
Like dying
Without vision or
My inner voice
I see nothing
I can't hear a sound
Why is God so silent
Is this unholy ground
Without true contrition
Is there forgiveness
I am not broken
But I've been broken down
I am imperfect
This is no easy journey
The path is hard to find
But if I keep on trying
I might avoid the flood
The deluge might be coming
But I am climbing the cliff wall
Perhaps I might just make it
Or maybe
This is the end to it all

Ten Tears Fall

Ten tears fall
Before I catch them
You never called
After our time
You don't care
How have I been
Am I better now
Or am I still enthralled
By your face
Ten Tears Fall
Every time I hear your name

Resistance of my will

Existence of my flesh
Neither negates nor proves my being
Resistance of my will
Is not offered up to be redeemed
Rather than proof my being is a jail
My soul is eternal
The flesh is the place of my sorrows
Tortured cries of pain
Rain down the tears
Let the ego flow
I am a moment
Let the wine of my blood be drunk
By those who sop their bread
In my ichors
When I am undone
Let them sup upon my torment
My limbs and neck may be severed
I do not desire to be here long
For the flesh is veil
Covering the doorway to forever
And I am tired
And I am done

So Beautiful, Princess

I'd call it a dream
But I wasn't asleep
I saw, with my eyes
My own eyes
So I know my dream was real
But I can't decide,
If I was fortunate
Or cursed
For I'll never see
Someone so beautiful
Again
This being was perfect
So beautiful
Like a Princess
Who rose up
And walked towards me
Up from the waters
And shore's reeds
She was silent
With eyes so clear blue
She was more than I could believe
But there she was
Without words of my own
I just gazed at her form
For she was clearly from another place
Than this one
I was alone
And saw her
And she walked towards me
Embraced me
Touched me
Kissed me
Tears streamed down
For she was my love
Returned to me
And I was home
Wherever she might deign to dwell
I don't know what happened next
Was I asleep, but awake
In heaven turned hell
I don't know
But I do know this
I'll never see another person
So beautiful
So stunningly beautiful
As her

One Finger: 6:01 central time, Memphis, TN, 1968, April 4th

It took just one
One Remington 760 Gamemaster
One finger
One hotel open window
Changed the way
We understood the world
One finger
Perhaps though, many hands
Took away a prophet
Who sought to cleanse the nation
To redeem the struggle
To condemn the hatred
And unify this land

January 15, 1947

We don't know her
We only know about her
She died horribly
Severed, sawed in two
But she was a person
Living a small life
Wishing for great things
But never becoming a wife
Of the war hero
Or movie star
Or anything worth her while
Just a person
Deserving more
Than what happened

Bones and Hearts

I've had enough pain to last me
Enough life lessons I don't want
I've been broken in heart and bones
And mind
I've had dreams that haunt me
I might heal
But I don't care
The memories last forever

No I Never Did

I never touched her
I never kissed her
I never embraced her
Never even met her
But she loved me
Said she needed me
Said she wanted me
Said she lusted me
Something inside me cried
Because I never did
No I never did
And yet
I wanted it
So bad

Overwhelmed and overcome

I've been overcome
I've been overwhelmed
By memories of you
I've dreamed those dreams
I've died in vain
Over and over
Woken in grass covered in dew
Alone again
Without my friend
The one who makes me renew
I still love you
I still love you
I've been dead since you've gone
I'll never be happy again
This flesh will fetid remain
I decay
I decay
I pass from this place
To one far better
Where I hope when you find me
You will kiss me
Embrace me
Touch my face
Hold me
And tell me you love me
Redeem me

It makes no sense

I know, I know
It makes no sense but
Love is forever
Once I am there
I never leave
People flit about it
As if love is a trampoline
But I never can
Once in my heart
I never let them go
My love is true
Whatever they do

Steelyard Cemetery

There is a graveyard in Bethlehem Pennsylvania
That holds the bodies of steel workers
And their families
Some never saw the world they lived in
Others worked until their bodies stopped working
Some never left the town they are buried in
The horizon choked in smoke
Was small for them

Fly Dark One

Fly away dark one
Fly to some place safe
This world is about to die
The fires of Armageddon rage
We've slowly and surely committed suicide

Fly away dark one
We've brought this upon ourselves
Feel no guilt
No shame
For we have created our hell
This world is in pain

Leave quickly
Flee
You must survive
There is no need for you
To embrace
Azrael

Decide, Me Inside

I am still dead
Still deciding
What I believe
I don't regret my life
I don't regret being alive
I don't worry for things
That didn't turn out
To be
The way they should have
Should have been
I could easily be
The one she loved
Instead
It wasn't me
No it wasn't
So this dead body
Remains that way
Far too much of this pain
At the core
But I don't regret it
I can't forget that it wasn't me
She choose another
Not me
And now I am back to dead
Like before
Nothing new
Nothing more

No Requiem for a Dying Man

I cut myself
But I don't bleed
I hung myself
But I could breathe
I shot myself
In the head
But the bullet killed
My family instead
No requiem
For me
For this dying man
I will not be released
From his attention span
I took some pills
But they dissolved
Like the efforts
I resolved
To take
Some day I'll see
What I've done
But until then
It has begun
To fade
No requiem
For a dying man
No salvation
For this crying land
I did my part
Now I am saying goodbye
This is the termination
Notice
This is my last stand

no no no

Slamming the door
Like some loud final word
Drowning the sound
Of goodbye
Reticent tears pour out
But I am not crying
I did that before
And you left then too
I never had a doubt
That you'd be gone
So I am just saying
no no no
no no no
Don't think
Don't feel
Just go with it
Just go

The Dust of the Passing Age

We cannot see the mountain from atop
We can only see what is below
The valley of our sorrow
The dust has taken over
From the failures
Of our hand
We walk and are covered
The dust rises
We are smothered
By the debris
Of our acts
The world we created
Falls before inevitable entropy
And the world before our arrival
Returns
And the dust
Covers every single footprint
Of our debacle
Hiding our existence
And beginning anew

The Legacy of Prometheus

Great Prometheus
How kind to give us fire
To light our imaginations alight
To fuel our growing desires
To control the flow
Of energy
To light the night with brightness
To move leviathans in the seas
How kind to give us fire
Prometheus was cursed for this
As were we
For children should not control
The fires of the Gods
For humans are not able
To deny their bestial voice
Unable to hold back in anger
We are inheritors
Of the fires
That burned this earth
That cursed this earth

"Kinship and companionship are terrible things."

“God help thee, old man, thy thoughts have created a creature in thee; and he whose intense thinking thus makes him a Prometheus; a vulture feeds upon that heart for ever; that vulture the very creature he creates.” Herman Melville

Spirit is Asylum from Flesh

Dissection
Decay
Fecund misery
The pain of existence often goes beyond my tolerance
My flesh is weary, it hurts sometimes just to breathe
The cage of this body, calls for my release
Asylum is needed
A sanitarium for the weak
My flesh is broken
Cover my body with a sheet

You are why

With you
There is hope anew
My heart stopped bleeding
I won't ever stop needing
You
When I sleep I'm not dreaming
Because all I think about is you
Sleep is filled with thoughts
Of holding you forever
I can't breathe without hoping
To draw in your scent
I can't see you without thinking
You are the one who heaven sent
Together
In your presence
I still long for you
In your absence
My heart beats but softer
With you I am redeemed
I love you
You are my reason
You are why
I want to be

Do what you wish, End it even

Shout my name
Push me
Back me against the wall
Line me up for execution
It is my end you seek
But I heard the call
And that prevents you
From stealing what I have
I believe unto my dying breath
I resist
There is nothing to kill
For my spirit is awake
And I live beyond the flesh
Blow out the candle
The flame still lives
Blow out the flame
The fire still burns
Inside
End my being
I will return
Kill my flesh
My body passes
The dream still lives
The curse broken
I am unafraid
End it
Do it now
For what you think is killing me
Will be my birth

If there is nothing

I am waiting to see if there is nothing
Because my life suggests that this is wrong
Mad irony howls, Cynical fate laughs
At the smoke of my burned remains
Choking my last breath
From drawing in
If I am alone there is no purpose
I know this is insane
But if there is nothing
No one cares, and there is only pain
So why should I worry?
If there is nothing
All I do is dust

My Heart's Sorrow

The sorrow of my heart
Is not from love
But the loss

The pain of my life
Is not from wounds
But the cost

I reach out
In the twilight
Between Heaven
And Hell
This earthbound flesh
Refuses to learn
What it is
To be forgiven
So I struggle

The dreams of my sleep
Can never match
The will of God

The sins redeemed
Can never reach
My soul at all

For God is waiting
And I seek
And there I will find
The lover of my being
Holding open the doors
Beckoning
Open
Kind

"I want a heart which is split, chamber by chamber, by the pain of separation from God, so that I might explain my longings and desires to it." Rumi

Beauty most dark

She was beautiful
But dangerous
Her looks would cut
Her voice would bite
She was alluring and yet
I feared her
For she offered me
All I wanted and
All that I might
Her eyes were stunning
Her body perfect
Her perfume made my ardor stir
But she was not my lover
But rather a temptress
Who made me burn
She drank the blood of the fallen
Supped upon the flesh of saints
Attacked the morals of all men
Desired us all to turn


Revelations 17,18

Not Soup, But Food

A supposed wise man said
Marriage, however good,
is like a great bowl of soup
The best soup ever, even
But do you want this,
the same soup every single day?
Love isn't like that
Rather,
You need to eat
Do you want food
Or hunger pains
Love feeds your heart
Love is like that
Marriage is fulfilling
If it is about love
You get to eat
Every day
And eat your fill

She waits, in vain

However fortunate her lover might be
Should he realize
She is waiting
While he is away upon some mission
Of charity or commerce
He does not see
That she longs to be with him
That her love is for him alone
And she waits
In misery
For he is gone
And she remains
Not knowing when he might return
And while he is frozen inside
For him she burns

Beauty

Not that which is outside
For that is flesh alone
Not inside, for that is entrails
Function but not perfection
But rather it is in her spirit
For there she is alive
With the beauty of creation
Her spirit is woven
By the most precise hands
Her beauty is known
In every land
And I am hers
Without reservation
For she moves me
She does
Her spirit alone

With her

Warmth inside keeping me safe
Soothing to my ear, the beat of her heart
Soft and gentle, to my soul
I am hers, entirely
With her, I am
Without her, I am not
The future may be dark
Sorrow may force me
To feed at its cup
But within her arms
I am content that all will be right
I am whole with her
I am content
And that is enough

Traitor Time

However many there are
You must be selfish
Hold on for dear life
Seconds abuse you
They do not renew
You do not get the lost back
Find and keep all you may
The end is always in view
So don't give in
Don't give up
Or you will stumble
And be lost
Time will always betray

Watching me as I fall

Your sorrow breaks you
Watching me as I fall
My abject ambivalence
Dismayed you
My hopes were chained
Against a stone wall
Disappointed by my failures
You gave everything
Until the very end
When I disgraced the name
From the beginning
How could you account for it
I represented you poorly
Failed all
How could you take my pain instead
You are just one spirit, I am legion
Your wings were broken
By my weight, rest and sleep
Don't let it take you
Like it took me without reason
Who am I to blame another
For the sins I committed
For the acts I played
I was the entire cast
writer, director and actor
Upon my own stage
With all the time passed
I was yet unworthy
Lost in my years
Of repeatedly reading
From the same page

Wind

The sand
The wind blowing
Sky is nearly pure blue
The heat beyond endurance
The air so dry it hurts
To open my eyes and look
To see the view
Before me
I am entranced by the ways
The sand blows
Despite it not being alive
It moves
In patterns
Without purpose
But beautiful
The sand thrives
Under the mastery
Of the wind
Designed
With delicate hands
Unseen

You feed me

I see the soaring seagulls
High above
Circling before coming down
To search for food
To sleep on the sands
But humans walk upon the shore
And the gulls lift upon winds
And I am aware then
That you feed me
I see children by the ocean
Stepping upon the sand
Running from the tide
As it crashes in
I taste the salt in the air
I feel the spray upon my face
I smell the ocean in its glory
I hear the cries of joy from the children
And God you feed me
You feed me
Every second spent
Outside of this moment
Is lost
For you are perfect
And your creation
Is beautiful

Inundation

Time flows but not like a river
Always moving
Inexorable but without aim
Simply filling every emptiness
It sweeps forward, backward
Inside and outside
Time is without our consent



Scrolls and tablets
Remember what men forget
Regrets and torments
of the killer torrents
Of the lost age
Of steel
Of the lost wisdoms
And learnings
Imagine the sorrows
Of a world erased
Civilizations rise
Fall
The water flows
The deluge grows
People die
As their world
Commits suicide
And time continues
To flow
To turn
To grow
To swirl

If You Told Me

This life I lead
Is killing me
Living in a hotel
Meant for migrants
Barely breathing
Only bleeding
You know I've been living
Someplace away from you
So we don't communicate
Like we'd like to do
I miss you
And hate this place
This freedom isn't free
It is a jail, and a chain
Holding me away
So if you said that you loved me
I'd be very overwhelmed
Flattered and moved
But
There is nothing I can do
There is a story I could tell
Of a love that was broken
Of a man compelled to fail, over and over
Like some token sad tale
But I appreciate your kindness
Thank you for caring
If you said that you loved me
Thank you for daring
Taking that risk
But I am a mess
I have nothing to offer
I'll have that drink now
The bottle is nearly empty, like my heart
Thanks but I don't want pity
These aren't tears
Don't you know, they are holy water
Cleansing my empty, vacant soul

A Storm in the Desert

You blew threw my life
With ethereal grace
Leaving nothing behind
But your fragrance
And tears
Like a storm in the desert
Or a black cloud in plains
Memories coat my heart
Like a dust storm
Causing pain
I never will forget
I never will regret
Your presence in my life
Refreshed my soul
Like August heat
Quenched by ice
But now you are gone
And I remain
Behind
Again

Asleep, yet walking

Constrictions
Contractions
Asleep but not
Awake but dreaming
Somnambulism
Solipsism
Shattered mirrors
Scattered vision
I see her everywhere
She isn't here
But she haunts my sight
Though I see
Through the glare
Of the light of the fires
On eternity's walls
Her dancing
Asleep, yet walking
I approach
Dead, yet moving
I hear her talking
To God
But I don't understand their voices
Their words don't make sense
And then I realize
There is something blocking my view
Clouding my sight
And when I move to gain better access
There is only the fire
And my body
Shivering in the night
Alone

Red Storm Bird

The winter was dry, despite the cold
But winds kept the living nearly frozen
But with or without snow
The wars went on
Crashing from the sky to above the plains below
The red storm birds hunted dragons
Who were made of steel and spit fire
The human toll was great between colliding forces
Trapped between the ire
Of fate and anger
Of hate and fear
The dire consequences of destiny
When titans clash
When enemies refuse to surrender
And death is the sole legacy

Foregone

Born with a dream
Rejecting the curse
I was never made for living
Upon this earth
I was a beast of burdens
Not of labor for men
But for the world beyond
This world is foregone
Forlorn and despondent
The world beyond
Is worthy of this strife
This world is flesh and clay
The next is God spark
And life

We Must Remember

We ought to remember
Never to forget the devastation
The retaliation and despair
We need to hold that
Tightly inside




We focus upon a single point and the distance from the present to the past flees
We ought to remember certain things, regardless of the horror
We need to be shocked and made to know what is truth
Through defeats or epic victories, we move



The darkness followed by light allows us to see the world displayed
In utterly disgusting detail, a world screaming in pain
From the war's rage



Tyrants and Democratic leaders
All are called upon to lead
War is rarely the correct answer
But it is chosen far more often
Than we need



The past is immutable
The events of it are complete
Despite interpretations
Regardless of what we read
Or are told
So find out for your self
The tragedies of the past



Winston Churchill “I would say to the House, as I said to those who have joined this Government: 'I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears, and sweat.' We have before us an ordeal of the most grievous kind. We have before us many, many long months of struggle and of suffering. You ask, what is our policy? I will say: It is to wage war, by sea, land and air, with all our might and with all the strength that God can give us: to wage war against a monstrous tyranny, never surpassed in the dark, lamentable catalogue of human crime. That is our policy. You ask, what is our aim? I can answer in one word: It is victory, victory at all costs, victory in spite of all terror, victory, however long and hard the road may be; for without victory, there is no survival.”

Adolf Hitler “I want war. To me all means will be right. My motto is not "Don't, whatever you do, annoy the enemy." My motto is "Destroy him by all and any means." I am the one who will wage the war!”

Benito Mussolini “Better to live a day as a lion than 100 years as a sheep.”

Hideki Tojo “The reason was the failure of both Japan and China to understand each other and the inability of America and the European powers to sympathize, without prejudice, with the peoples of East Asia.”

Josef Stalin “This war is not as in the past; whoever occupies a territory also imposes on it his own social system. Everyone imposes his own system as far as his army can reach. It cannot be otherwise. If now there is not a communist government in Paris, this is only because Russia has not an army which can reach Paris in 1945.”

Franklin Delano Roosevelt “I have directed that all measures be taken for our defense, that always will our whole nation remember the character of the onslaught against us. No matter how long it may take us to overcome this premeditated invasion, the American people, in their righteous might, will win through to absolute victory.”